The Simple Sophisticate - Intelligent Living Paired with Signature Style

Shannon Ables

The simple sophisticate is someone who prefers quality over quantity, sensible living over mindless consumption, personal style instead of trendy fashions, has an insatiable curiosity for life’s endless questions and a desire to live a truly fulfilling life rather than being led around by the nose. Inspired by her lifestyle blog The Simply Luxurious Life, Shannon Ables (the original Simple Sophisticate) shares with listeners tips on how to live a refined life on an everyday income, a life of true contentment. Founded on the principle of the art of living a life of quality over quantity, episodes explore topics ranging from creating an everyday life you love living, strengthening mindfulness practices, preparing seasonally delicious meals, building a capsule wardrobe, traveling the world (Francophiles and Anglophiles tune in as Paris as well as the English countryside are favorite destinations), and living life to the fullest without breaking the bank because living well is really quite simple. *illustration by artist Sarah Löcker exclusively commissioned for the show read less
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Episodes

388: Why Not . . .  Become the CFO (Chief Financial Officer) of Your Own Life and Experience Financial Freedom for the Rest of Your Life? 14 Foundational Pieces
Sep 18 2024
388: Why Not . . . Become the CFO (Chief Financial Officer) of Your Own Life and Experience Financial Freedom for the Rest of Your Life? 14 Foundational Pieces
What I would like to share with you today are 14 foundational pieces that will establish and continue to grow your financial freedom. Whether you work for a boss or work for yourself, I will be sharing how to make your way to financial freedom and also remain financially free once you arrive without being stagnant. In other words, when we are financially free, we now have space, energy and opportunities that we didn't have before. Whether that is creatively because our mind is free to not worry about our finances because we have put into place systems that we trust and know work in our favor, and because we have space mentally, we have more energy to expend on what we love to do instead of what we have to do which leads us to more opportunities crossing our paths because we our present and fully engaged with the moment, bravely being ourselves and dancing with life instead of surviving and just making it through. Before we explore today's list, I will point out that this is not necessarily the typical list of save more, spend less - thrift, thrift, thrift! I will be sharing with you some examples from my own life that in hindsight demonstrate that playing it 'safe' isn't always a wise move if you want to make the gains (in any respect) that you desire. As well, while yes, we are talking about money, so much of the financial advice we read (but not all - i.e. Deepak Chopra and Kate Northrup along with others) focuses entirely on the logical and mathematical side of how to be financial free, and while that plays a powerful and necessary role - knowing how the monetary world works and basic math regarding interest, etc., there is also a part we cannot know entirely or with certainty and that is why knowing ourselves, living a life of true contentment and being brave enough to find and then embrace our dharma is crucial to remaining financially free. Find the Show Notes on The Simply Luxurious Life blog - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast388
387: The Importance of 'Hero' Pieces in Your Wardrobe and the 6 Core Components
Sep 4 2024
387: The Importance of 'Hero' Pieces in Your Wardrobe and the 6 Core Components
When we think of the term hero in its typical circumstance, we think of someone saving the day, making everything better, and restoring the peace, security and joy to those or what had momentarily been in peril. Now fashion or our personal style is not a life or death situation, I will acknowledge this upfront, but for the purposes of today's conversation, the hero pieces in our wardrobe are, as defined by The Ethical Brand Directory, "the ultimate item of clothing that completes any wardrobe. Hero pieces can be dressed up, dressed down and just become an ‘essential piece’’ that you can’t live without".  Another definition identifying 'hero' pieces comes from a recent article from the WSJ titled "Think This Looks 'Effortless'? stating "[They are] pieces you can always rely on to deliver a feeling of insouciance." In other words, enable you to relax in your clothing and pay no mind to your clothes or outfit because you know you look fabulous. The beautiful breadth of Hero pieces is that they stretch from clothing to accessories to shoes to just about anything that pulls your wardrobe together with the snap of the fingers simply by selecting it to be part of your ensemble. For each individual, the specific Hero pieces will be different to look at them or list them, but how we identify a Hero piece adheres to core concepts that I want to share with you today to give you an idea of what to look for when it comes to finding the Heroes in your closet and trusting that they are worth the investment due to the power of completion and confidence they bring to just about any outfit you will wear.   Find the Show Notes on The Simply Luxurious Life blog - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast387
386: What I Have Learned So Far in French Class, Part Huit (8)
Aug 14 2024
386: What I Have Learned So Far in French Class, Part Huit (8)
The learning continues, and the French language continues to become clearer and clearer with each word I hear. Granted, it is a slow journey of progress, but indeed progress has been made. As I sat watching both the Opening and Closing Ceremonies of the Jeux Paris, I found myself for the first time actually wishing there were no translations as I found I could understand most of what was being said in French (admittedly, I may have paused and rewound a time or two ;)). To recognize words that previously were absolutely babbel to me in years past found me celebrating seemingly small, but, to me, grand progress. With that said, I am not proficient yet, and I have had frustrations, but I have continued forward and I am grateful I have. Part of the reason I want to share my French language journey with you is to encourage and reassure you that the journey will be long, but the progress will be great, and here is the paradox, only if we both run up against frustrations and keep at it. We can do it! I shared in the first post to kick off this year's French Week (the 9th!) that international language institutes have found it takes approximately 600 hours of regular learning of a new language to become proficient (this is for the easier to learn languages, of which French is high on that list, being one of the simpler language to learn - yes, it is true believe it or not ;)). And when you break down how long it takes an average student to cover 600 hours, it looks to be about 2-3 years. Knowing this has eased my mind and reminded me to be patient and remain consistently engaged and surrounded by the language - through taking my courses, doing my homework, studying even when I don't have homework and attempting to speak French in class whenever I have the opportunity. Having concluded FR 202 this past June, two years of online study through Washington D.C. Alliance de Française are behind me and have found me much improved in both my breadth of vocabularly, pronunciation as well as comprehension and yes, even confidence in formulating sentences (however, simple) to carry on a conversation. The last post/episode in this ongoing series was shared back in February - episode #347, when I wrapped up the 100 level, so now I am back to share with you what I have learned during FR 201 and 202. On y va !   Find the Show Notes for episode #386 here - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast386
383: 11 Health & Beauty Secrets for a Better Second Half, as taught by Liz Earle
Jun 5 2024
383: 11 Health & Beauty Secrets for a Better Second Half, as taught by Liz Earle
"My years working in wellbeing have taught me that it's about living life in a daily, achievable balance. The one thing that counts above all else? Consistency. It doesn't have to be much and it doesn't have to be hard, but it does have to be consistent." —Liz Earle, author of A Better Second Half: Dial back your age to live a longer, healthier, happier life — Sharing my secrets to looking and feeling better than ever With forty's arrival five years ago, I gradually began to see subtle, very subtle changes in my skin, hair and physical body; however, as someone who has always been curious at a young age about staying healthy regarding what I eat, how I care for my body and skin, etc., I wasn't necessarily surprised, but I also knew I wanted to become even more of a student learning how to best take care of my entire body and mind to prevent anything I did have control over, delay anything that while inevitable, need not be sped up by ignorant lack of care-taking, as well as prolong the quality of my living experience as cognitive and physical health and strength are key components to deepening the quality of everyday living, connections, opportunities, etc. Ever the student, I ask questions incessantly, of any expert in their field I have the good fortune to work with, interview or schedule sessions with, and when I don't know someone personally, I reach for books written by experts who have done research in their field of study. As well, reading content by someone, a woman, in this instance who has experienced and lived and is living through the changes of our body and skin and mind, has tried and knows what works in a healthy approach is very much looking up to a wise sister, aunt or mother. So when I learned that Liz Earle, a long-time veteran in the sustainable beauty and wellbeing arena beginning in the early 80s, she, now in her early 60s and not only looking amazing but is living an amazingly full and inspiring life (here is her personal IG account), had written a new book that is already a Sunday Times bestseller, but more importantly, it is worthy of that achievement because it is a book full of nuggets of valuable information to give you the keys to indeed living a better second half of your life, I purchased it, and read it in two nights. Now, I would like to share an introduction to 11 nuggets of valuable information she shares, and if these speak to you as well, I am confident you will appreciate all that the book includes. Explore the Show Notes for episode #383 - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast383 Learn more about TSLL's Contentment Masterclass - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/contentmentcoursefaqsintro/
382: Antique & Vintage Shopping in Barnard Castle, England + 5 Ways I Decorate with these Treasures
May 22 2024
382: Antique & Vintage Shopping in Barnard Castle, England + 5 Ways I Decorate with these Treasures
You know you've found a quaint English town when the name of the town has a beloved nickname personifying it. Barnard Castle, or Barney, as the locals often call it, is a small town in County Durham, so in the northeastern portion of England, and the population rests just under 6,000. Now, when I began to make my plans to visit England for this particular trip, one of my top priorities centered around finding treasures for Le Papillon as the 3+ year customization which had finally concluded, as I wanted to begin to add the polish, if you will. So antiquing and vintage decor shops were on my radar, and I could not have been more grateful for her recommendations (of which they provided many for everything, not just antiquing). So off I went on my first full day in the country, toodling about in my rental car for a 20 minute drive to Barnard Castle, and what I found was more than I could have hoped for, even if my luggage might not have thought so. However, I always pack an empty piece of luggage that is foldable, so I thought I would be able to figure it out. A story for another day, but after all was said and done, thankfully, everything made it home in its original form. (be sure to stop by the Show Notes to see oodles of photographs and a video of my visit to Barnard Castle) As promised, here are five reasons I love welcoming antiques and vintage finds into my home décor and have been doing so since I was able to decorate my own spaces, then apartments and then finally homes and houses. I will acknowledge, I am not someone who buys antiques just to have them. I don't have a second home to decorate or a large house for that matter, so what I purchase has to have a home, but that is part of the fun, taking the time to first know what you are in need of as far as finishing a space as well as functionality and then patiently waiting until you find it or should I say, your paths cross, and you find each other. :) Check out the Show Notes here - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast382
380: How Rituals Enrich Our Lives IF We Choose and Engage with Intention
May 1 2024
380: How Rituals Enrich Our Lives IF We Choose and Engage with Intention
Rituals, whether designed by us solely for ourselves, or legacy rituals, or relationship or group rituals that involve others, give us more than can be imagined to deepen the quality of our life than we thought possible prior to fully engaging and incorporating them into our lives. You may recognize Dr. Michael Norton's name, a professor of business administration at Harvard Business School, as he co-wrote a book I thoroughly enjoyed and often sited for over a decade on the effects of money and happiness with Elizabeth Dunn, Happy Money: The Science of Happier Spending (if you haven't read it, I highly recommend it, as their work has been sited on TSLL as well). Released just this past April, Norton's new book, The Ritual Effect, shares the research behind the effects of rituals on our daily life, and while he begins with sharing rituals' origins which we might often imagine when we hear the word, those "rigid, communal practices" which he describes as legacy rituals, the primary focus rests upon daily life and all of the potential benefits rituals can give us whether it be in our daily routine, or when we step into a new life chapter, or when we say goodbye to someone for any number of reasons, how we work, how we connect and strength relationships, how we design holidays with family and blended families, how to heal and how to recognize when rituals are causing the problem of division for example or exclusion. For our purposes in today's episode we're going to focus primarily on exactly what constitutes a ritual, the importance of having them in our lives and where to incorporate them, as well as sprinkle examples throughout the conversation (so be sure to tune in to the audio version of this episode if you are reading the Show Notes here on the blog :)).   Find the Show Notes on TSLL blog - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast380
379: How (and Why) to Be Your Own Best Friend
Apr 17 2024
379: How (and Why) to Be Your Own Best Friend
"We are not born with the secret of how to live [well], and too many of us never learn it. There is nothing cold-blooded or mechanical about it, but there are many things we have to learn to do . . . the first thing is to realize we've probably been looking in the wrong place. The source is not outside us; it is within." —Mildred Newman & Bernard Berkowitz, authors of How to Be Your Own Best Friend Befriend yourself and you have a friend for life. This simple saying, often expressed, while true, is often not understood as to how it can be possible. But the most awesome news I want to share with you today is that you have had the answers to so much of the peace, calm, and clarity you have been seeking traveling within you all this time. How to tap into and what exactly are you looking for? That is what we are going to talk about today. Inspired by a book that was written in 1971 Mildred Newman and her husband, both psychologists, Bernard Berkowitz, the title was originally How To be Your Own Best Friend: A Conversation With Two Psychoanalysts. Consisting of only 74 pages, their insights are shared, as this title suggests, in conversation form - questions followed by answers. While little known when the couple originally self-published, it was with the help of author, screenwriter and director Nora Ephron, who upon reading the book quite liked it so she introduced the authors to her book agent upon which it then became a national bestseller (learn more about how she helped in this article published earlier this year). Picking up my own copy and zooming through it, I found common sense advice, grounded in approachable guidance sharing reminders and nudges of how we can help ourselves out but often are too timid to do so due to a variety of cultural circumstances and pressures. As I read, the overlap of choosing to be your best friend and finding and experiencing contentment quickly became apparent, and having just wrapped up producing all of the filmed lessons for TSLL's Contentment Masterclass, as you will discover when you enroll, knowing ourselves and honoring what we find to be true for ourselves resides at the core of a fulfilling life. In the words of the authors, becoming our best friend is sage wisdom to follow. However, what does that look like? Being our own best friend? That's what I want to share with you today and the benefits of doing so. Let's get started.   View the Show Notes on the blog: https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast379
378: Choose to Compost Your Past: How the Arrival of the Spring Season is a Metaphor for Life
Apr 3 2024
378: Choose to Compost Your Past: How the Arrival of the Spring Season is a Metaphor for Life
"Composting what was into what will be." Mother Nature and the cycle of seasons provide endless life lessons and nourishing guidance if we are wise enough to heed her teachings. More specifically, spring's arrival, the season as we all know that introduces itself after winter, the latter season of which for many of us can be frigid, keeping us more home-bound and bundled up far more often than we might prefer as well as to cause us to take stock of our home environment most directly and intimately. It was upon hearing the statement above in a recent yoga class that I immediately smiled. Why? Well, there is much truth in this literal description of how compost is created and as to why it applies to our lives, it can figuratively be true as well. However . . . We have to choose, and thus remember, to compost in the first place! Spring gifts us with an abundance of wonderments and opportunities to apply what we have been investing in and working on during winter, or healing or resting in order to feel rejuvenated and reenergized. So not only do we need to remember to view winter as an opportunity to tend to what needs our attention, we must also be courageous enough to step forward into what that rest has given us. Simply because we plant, water and fertilize a new plant in spring, or pot up a dahlia tuber in spring, doesn't mean the beauty we hope to come will appear in spring. No, it will not. The dahlias take around 100 days to share their first flower, but once they begin flowering, so long as they have been planted in their right conditions and the gardener keeps dead-heading, the blooms keep on coming until the first frost in early fall. This is beautiful reminder to be patient with ourselves and the changes we have begun to put into place, or the steps we have begun to take that will eventually lead us where we want to arrive. Spring is the beginning of the new journey, but we may not arrive where we wish to go until Summer or early Fall, but we will never arrive if we don't choose to compost first. In today's episode we will explore eight instances in our life when unwanted moments have happened and how to compost them into something we do want. I welcome you to join us and tune in.   Have a look at the Show Notes for the episode, #378 here - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast378
376: Wise Investments: Understand the Difference between a Good Value and a Good Deal
Mar 6 2024
376: Wise Investments: Understand the Difference between a Good Value and a Good Deal
The savviness of wise money management encompasses many factors, but one is an approach often overlooked or dismissed: Understanding the difference between a Good Value versus a Good Deal. Here in the states tax season is upon us, and so many of us may have money on the mind even more than we usually do; however, I often find myself at the beginning of the new year assessing my monthly budget, determining where I am gaining value or unnecessarily causing more tasks and draining money. Ultimately, whenever I sit down to assess my money, my goal is to do so less often, knowing I have invested well, so I can go about the living of my life that I love and trust that my decisions will stand a long duration of time offering the performance, purpose or function I purchased it for. In other words, I don't want to be shopping for my capsule wardrobe constantly, restocking and replacing worn out jeans that while a great deal, only lasted one or maybe two seasons. Likewise, I don't want to have to be taking my car to the repair shop frequently, or gassing up frequently or even replacing the car itself as frequently (more on what I am hinting at below in our discussion). When we invest well, and apply the wisdom of purchase great value rather than falling victim to a good deal, we deepen the quality of our overall lives because however we enjoy living them, we can do so without surprise expenditures frequently arising. Today, I would like to explore a handful of areas of our lives in which investing in Good Value vs. a Good Deal occurs, and to offer explanation as to why paying the large price tag upfront will save more money in the long run, as well as instances when a large price tag upfront is just welcoming more stress throughout the duration of your ownership. Let's get started. View the Show Notes for the episode here — https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast376
375: How to Become a More Skilled Participant in the Living of Our Life
Feb 21 2024
375: How to Become a More Skilled Participant in the Living of Our Life
The concluding note to readers that author, yoga and meditation instructor Deborah Adele shares in her book Yamas & Niyamas: Exploring Yoga's Ethical Practice includes the wish that they become more skilled participants in the living of their lives. And with the wisdom she shares in her book, she provides them with the tools to do just that. Having shared various insights here on the blog gained from her book, specifically in this post about the simple conscious everyday choice that leads to true fulfillment, and as we conclude the two month-long series of 'new year, new life' as you continued along the way to making the change you set to bring to be as the new year began, I wanted to explore two simple, yet powerfully crucial habits that will make the difference you seek inevitable. A skilled participant. In order to be 'skilled' we must know the skills that would be beneficial to acquire. And in order to embody being a participant in our lives, we must be engaged, we must act, we must take part. While we have covered multiple skills throughout this podcast, here on the blog and in TSLL's books (and will compile and detail them all in a linear approach to cultivating contentment in TSLL's upcoming Contentment Master Class video course), the two skills, I want to talk about today are simple to adopt and when we do, the quality of our life and everydays is amplified for the better: Choose to live instead of wait. In other words, Living vs. Waiting - choose the former.Choose to savor rather than to rush. In other words, Savoring vs. Rushing - again, choose the former. Let's dive into each of these in more detail . . .  Check out the Show Notes for this epsiode on TSLL blog - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast375
374: What I Have Learned in French Class, So Far - part sept (7)
Feb 7 2024
374: What I Have Learned in French Class, So Far - part sept (7)
Bonjour à tous ! Just last week, I concluded FR 105 with Washington DC's Alliance de Français, a Zoom/online course that met twice a week, two hours each time since just after Thanksgiving. You may remember that Part Six of this series was shared during TSLL's Annual French Week which shared what I had learned through FR 104 and 103, and now it is time to share some progress! Thankfully, there has been progress and while I chose to take Everyday Situational French this fall due to my travel schedule, this once-a-week meeting provided me the opportunity to keep the French language on the tip of my tongue before I could dive back in to the regular course work. Some of what I share will be from the Situational French course, but most of it was learned during FR 105. I am tickled to share that while my French definitely has a looooooong way to go, the ease I am feeling constructing basic sentences with a few different tenses delights me to no end. Last year at this time I was nervous and hesitant to attempt to say anything slightly different than what I said the week before when the professor would greet us, but now I at least can speak without hesitation and share what I did over the weekend. With that said, with growth comes growing pains, and I had a few moments throughout the past 10 weeks of frustration when it just wasn't making sense; however, I have a new-to-me professor, she being French and also a long-time educator, I was and am so grateful for her expertise and professionalism. She pushed, but then lightened up and stuck with us when she could tell we were struggling. In those moments, she encouraged us to keep trying and then doubled down on reviewing that particular difficult piece of the language to ensure the concept was acquired. As a fellow educator, what I observed was a keen awareness demonstrating her skill of both the language and how to teach it based on where the learner was and not holding true to the lesson plan if the class wasn't ready to move forward. I am eager to step back into her class when courses resume later this month. I have made it to FR 201! (We now are enjoying a two week vacances.) Tune in to discover 13 things I have learned so far in French class.  View the Show Notes — https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast374
373: How to Nourish Your Creative Being: Cultivate An Artistic Hearth & Home
Jan 17 2024
373: How to Nourish Your Creative Being: Cultivate An Artistic Hearth & Home
"Part of art making is living your life in such a way that your work gets done, over and over—and that means, among other things, finding a host of practices that are just plain useful . . . a life lived within productive patterns. The life of a productive artist becomes filled with useful conventions and practical methods. And in truly happy moments those artistic gestures move beyond simple procedure, and acquire an inherent aesthetic all their own. They are your artistic hearth and home." —David Bayles & Ted Orland, authors of Art & Fear In unforced or unexpected moments, ideas, solutions and connections appear at the forefront of our mind providing a sense of relief, exhilaration and celebration we may have never thought possible. Such wondrous moments indeed do seem to the onlooker and to the unaware individual to appear magically, and while there will always be an element involved beyond our control, the good news is we have far more contribution to ensuring such ahas happen and happen more frequently than we may have initially thought. The paradox of being a professional creative in any field that must produce work outside of a robotic construct, so this stretches well beyond that of a traditional artist, although most certainly, this need of creating an artistic hearth and home is essential to an artist of any medium, is that the day and life needs to have structure in order to create the freedom to discover and then to bring to being that which is discovered by the undistracted mind. From writing to parenting, to teaching to engineering, to designing whether in clothing, décor or in the graphic arts and even to leading or managing people in any career field, creativity, remaining open to receiving the ideas that wish to be discovered, is present and powerful. And it is up to each of us to nurture an artistic hearth & home for it to be discovered on a regular basis. Because it can be. As we continue to move through the first weeks of the year, our intentions remain clear and all of our efforts, each small regular change of habit contribute to the bringing to fruition the change or outcome we seek. Most importantly, we must enjoy the journey in order to remain upon it which is why I wanted to bring today's episode/post to you. When we thoughtfully and with intention curate our sanctuary to be an artistic hearth and home, we not only provide security and safety for ourselves to reside throughout our days and in-between our trips to work and life outside of the home, we also create warmth which encourages us to grow, expand and evolve in ways we have never been but now know is the next best step, the step that keeps niggling at us to let be and to stop holding back out of fear and doubt. So how do we go about cultivating an artistic hearth & home? Tune in to discover the 10 nourishing ideas. https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast373
371: Savoring A Quiet Christmas — Simple, Yet Significant
Dec 20 2023
371: Savoring A Quiet Christmas — Simple, Yet Significant
Whether or not snow has fallen come December, the warmth and cheer of good tidings appearing about town, the neighbors, in the shops and arriving in the mail by way of the annual Christmas cards sent from friends and family living near and far always wraps me in a figurative hug. This year, similar to last year, I will be spending Christmas at home in Bend, Oregon, and it is exactly where I want to be. And leading up to the festive day has been and will continue to be sprinkled with intentional activities, pastimes and nibbles that create a festive, cozy atmosphere I feel most fortunate to be able to savor. Each of us will go through seasons in our lives, stepping out of old chapters and into new ones when we embrace our courage to welcome what is awaiting to be given to us, and such is the case for me that I am delighting in quiet Christmases. As Nigel Slater eloquently writes in The Christmas Chronicles, in his delicious, image evoking prose, "Christmas is celebrated by Christians and non-Christians alike. It is a cultural event as much as a religious one". I share the rest of the quote in last year's holiday episode - #347 if you want to have a look, but part of why Christmas and the entirety of November and December is treasured by so many is that it is celebrated around the world and it is celebrated by people of a variety of different beliefs or non-beliefs, and that is a reason to smile and appreciate the season all the more. Perhaps inspired a bit by Beth Kempton's beloved book that I know many TSLL readers have enjoyed and return to reading each November and December, and adding to the list shared last year, episode #347, that included 9 Ways to Savor Christmas at Home, Alone, Simply Luxuriously, I wanted to share today's episode of how to savor a quiet Christmas with as few or as many people as you desire, and reveal how these thoughtful ways to enjoy this special time of year, while not extravagant, complex or even requiring money, can bring a deep richness to the season, making it all the more special. Let's take a look at the list. Visit the Show Notes:  https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast371
370: Savoring the Many Benefits of Being Single at Heart, my talk with author Dr. Bella DePaulo
Dec 6 2023
370: Savoring the Many Benefits of Being Single at Heart, my talk with author Dr. Bella DePaulo
"My mission in putting the single at heart on the map is to rewrite what it means to be single. Single life, to those of us who are single at heart, is a joyful place, a place to learn and grow. It is a big-hearted, expansive, meaningful life full of possibilities . . . intimacy, to us, is personal; in that domain as in all others, we follow our hearts rather than the cultural rulebooks. We chart our own life courses, with meaningfulness, psychological richness, and authenticity as our guide." —Dr. Bella DePaulo, author of Single at Heart: The Power, Freedom, and Heart-Filling Joy of Single Life Joining me on the podcast today is a guest who has courageously chosen to share that she thoroughly and unapologetically savors living a single life. The leading expert on single living, Dr. Bella DePaulo dispels the myths that pervade modern-day (and historic) cultures around the world when it comes to being single by looking at the research that is often cherry-picked and misleading as it speaks to in what type of relationship status one finds the most happiness. But most importantly, in her new book that was just released yesterday December 5th (2023), Single at Heart: The Power, Freedom, and Heart-Filling Joy of Single Life, she focuses on an abundance of findings that reveal the many benefits of living single. From improved health and deeper life satisfaction as we age. Thankfully, so much of what is portrayed in media - films, books, television, pretty much everywhere - is not an accurate depiction of where and how happiness is found. By no means is Single at Heart an anti-marriage or anti-couple book, but rather a book that reveals that those of us who have chosen to be single, who find it far more fulfilling than being in a traditional couple, need only trust our inner compass to continue to choose the life that brings us fulfillment. As she points out, the world would be far more peaceful and content if we would trust what we know to be true of ourselves - those who wish to be in a couple would find people who truly wanted to be in a couple, and those who savored their single life would not feel forced to choose a life that was not nourishing. Tune in to today's conversation where we will talk about the priority and value of freedom as well as benefits of solitude for the Single at Heart, and also speak to how those who are widows/widowers, as well as divorcees, can step into a new chapter of revelation about where and how joy can be cultivated. Dr. DePaulo discusses the importance of nurturing The Ones rather than just The One and reminds us that courageously saying we love our single life is what is needed to change the view that the culture errantly holds on to.