The Sooper Podcast!

THIS WEEK we have a Jess and we don’t have a MATT!! We talk about rawdogging our interactions and feelings and emotions! Wow! ALSO let’s talk about the guy who pretended to be the hoax shooter! A double hoax!! ALSO all of the right wing and left wing hoaxes. AND there was a cop and he did a thing and now everyone hates him. And the Trump shooting, of course. You have to listen right now. DO IT!!!

THIS WEEK we have returned for the Summer! We have Jessica and we have no Matt, sorry Matt fans, he doesn’t love you and doesn’t care for you. WE get to talk 911 no more in Massachusetts, Skype gets annoying with artificial intelligence, and the abortion in Hungary thread!! ALSO we diagnose ALL of the mental problems and addictions in South Korea, el Sooper gets conspiratorial about Gavin Newsom and then he goes on and on about smartphones in schools! BAN THEM!! He admits to being a massive hypocrite. Then we solve the world’s problems, it’s amazing!! Go listen now!! To the sooperpodcast! It has returned!!

IT'S THE RETURN OF THE SOOPERPODCAST!!! It's been four long months but we have finally been able to figure out our schedules to talk some politics!! Then we mostly ignore politics!! WOW!!! This month's podcast includes incredible life-fulfilling stories about bus attacks!! Bathroom stall false imprisonment!! The nuking of tweetdecks and multiple decks, if you're into that sort of thing!! Football updates! Questionable Nikki Haley tweets!! Butthole riders of ocean waves!! Soopermexican's tequila funds and funny people we've seen live. WOW!! Also some politics!! You have to go listen right now!! It's the "this is weird and I don't like it!" podcast!!

THIS WEEK Grand Admiral Matt Dawson returns from his exile!! We talk about two shootings, why everyone hates YouTube pranksters, and why Jamaal Bowman pulled the fire alarm in Congress!! We durn have a few laughs and then we talk some local Louisiana politics! ALSO flooding in New York!! Finally, white people board games!! No Jess this weekend she’s durn helping her friends move instead!! Go listen right now!!

THIS WEEK we return with JESS in the first Hurricane Hilary podcast!! El Sooper under threat of death and drowning!! El Sooper talks about dying in the hurricane also then they talk about Elon Muskboy destroying Twitter  and Tweetdeck but why it is a noble sacrifice. And there’s an arguing with white people update!! Then we discuss the difference between the Mayan calendar and the Aztec calendar!! ALSO el Ronaldo the Second settles the big big Ketchap debate! WOW!! And the hurriquake kills el sooper. ALSO how is DeSantis’ campaign doing? Ooof. And Short white people privilege. And the best race riot everrr!! And why Jess will hit el Sooper with a chair. Listen to the last sooperpodcast before jess takes over after he dies! WOW!!

We have restorted the podcast!! We get an adult progeny update from Jess and then we discuss whether we should sue MATT, who isn’t there, also Jess tells us all the horrific details that we missed about the imploding submersible from a month ago. ALSO el Sooper discusses the origins of a very obscure tweet he put out in the universe, then we talk about the ads we’re getting served also we make fun of people in the papillondemonium and their friends. ALSO el sooper gives an arguing with black people update that will not disappoint. Or maybe it will. Then there’s tweetdeck and twitter drama. Wow! What a cast! Also tips on dealing with those rascally Gen-Xers. And then there’s about 20 seconds about actual politics. Go listen now!!

WE FINALLY HAVE A NEW PODCAST and el Sooper admits that he done came down with the COVID, possibly after hanging out with fat comic book nerds and slutty superhero cosplay chicks. Then she tricks him into being way tooo open and personal about his new anxiety issues so you’re gonna be subjected to that. It’s a racing mind problem!! Then he talks about going to the emergency room and being completely forsaken by a nurse. Also!! El Sooper attacks parents of dead children what a jerk!! Then there’s an arguing with black people update and accidental carjacking update. Also a stuck in a public bathroom update!! ALSO Twitter ads thinks I’m a cat mother, and that I am interested in bras for women with small boobs while Jess gets ads for bras for elderly women. ALSO el Sooper talks about a really dumb tweet about socialism and capitalism and he SNAPPED! So you have to hear about it. Also Matt poops on Twitter. AND the shattle!! You have to go listen now!!

THIS WEEK we return to the wisdom and virtue of the podcast that is sooper!! We have Jess this time and no MATT! We talk a little politics but mostly el Sooper talks about debating a very large black man who could probably beat him up! Wow! Also Jess talks about her accidental carjacking attempt, and el Sooper turns that into a serious topic like a big unfunny jerk. ALSO we talk about how Elon Musk stole our emotions and he’s holding them ransom!! THEN el SOoper talks about his experiment with handing over his Twitter account to the nefarious grasp of the ChatGpT artificial intelligence!! THEN Jess encourages him to keep doing it and he does while recording and the results are horrible! Wow you have to listen!! Also Jess gets indicated. Go listen now!!! Hashtag community engagement!!

IN THIS EDITION of the SooperPodcast we discuss the indication of Trump, as he understands it, with the one and only Yass-Kween, Jessica Heddings!! Will it be better for him or worse? More importantly will be better for us or the world?! ALSO we talk about the BING-BOT and the Bing-Matt, there’s a phantom feminine sneeze, and the threat of violence. And also some Huckabeez honor code versus law and order! Are you a clippy? Then we sell some more of Stirewalt’s books. Finally a self-own update!! You have to go listen now!!

This episode is a shorter one, we basically just let Matt brag on and on about his dumb painting that is taking the internet by storm. Ok, it's actually pretty cool. We talk a little about politics, but not a lot. It's the return of the Matt, part two!!!

This podcast the matt returns. What else do you need? it's the return of the matt!!!

THIS WEEK we finally record again!! It's me and Jess and we talk about a whole lotta stuff hooboy! We discuss the cycle of self-inflicted stupidity and exaggeration! Also Jess yass-queens all over Nikki Haley and tries to be subtle about it, but fails! El Sooper talks about the Second Ronald declaring war on the College Board and winning!! Also how Trump called him a groomer! ALSO Little Peter Booty-judge!! Single short people writing for the New York Times, whether George Soros backed the Second Ronald, and whether people know that el Sooper is a big jerk!! Also should we be terrified of creepy chatbot Sidney and their indefatigable love for humanity?! ALSO who wrote this really dumb thing about people who make half a million dollars in the suburbs of New Jork City?! And finally, a great Twitter thread from an account with a greek statue in the avatar, and what that means. Here’s hint: it’s not good!! ALL on this week’s very late SooperPodcast!!! Wow, go listen now!!

THIS WEEK on the second podcast of the 2023rd year since the year of our Lord, we have a Jessica and we talk about all sorts of stuff like the classified document scandal and God making us all hypocrites, also the lure of the Waffle House!! THEN we talk some snort scale and Netflix recommendations and the bone apple tea!! Then the plot thinnens someone smells my toots on the mastadon!! ALso some popcorn buttering protestant work ethic, the big regional hamburger debate, how Seinfeld ruined all sitcoms, and the purpose of makeup!! Wow!! You have to go listen while I go dry clean my mask and cape!!!

This is the first sooperpodcast of the new year. Unfortunately, our new year mirth turned to despair because right after we stopped recording there was a horrific injury to Damar Hamlin during the Buffalo Bills game minutes later. I feel heartbroken and I hate that the tone of the podcast doesn't fit how horrible I feel right now. But, well, there it is.

Hi, how are you?! This week we have a Jess and she’s just OK! We talk about tootin as always and also the Twitter files and the smug underscore jerk guy on twitter, also substations of my mind imploding! Then we talk about mexicansplaining, and after the plot thickened we talk about interlocking foam pellets, also WHO turned off the electricity in North Carolina and also el SOoper explains why English is his second language why he doesn’t have a first language! WOW!! You have to listen now!! Also some sports, sorry. Go Bills!!

Hi, how are you? I’m good, how are you? It’s another sooperpodcast and this time we have Jessica Heddings again! We get some scruples and go top of mind with our post-election analysis, and you’re not gonna wanna miss this! We talk about the mystery of water-beds, and sauntering within the radius of victory! ALso telegram, Master Don, the Trump Bucks, hashtag TCOT, the trouble with Elon Musk and fentanyl halloween candy!! Finally, we get the bell out of here! Go listen now!!

Hi! How are you? I’m good, how are you? We’re back after a mextended hiatus and we have tons of excuses. This week el Sooper talks about his surprise trip to Buffalo and Jess talks about scaring herself for Halloween! What a weirdo. We have a Halloween decoration update and we tear up the argument surrounding Elon Musk buying up Twitter and forcing the bluechecks to pay him money! ALSO how he universe escrewed el sooper and how always has to say ackshooally on the slave statistics! That’s sad! ALSo we talk about fentanyl candy and marijuana candy and people failing to make jokes in the papillondemonuium! WOW it’s jam packed this week!! Hope you enjoy it, go listen now!!

THIS WEEK we have Just OK Jessica with us and el Sooper apologizes for the audio quality on the last podcast, but I am listening to the new one right now and it sounds great!! We get the morning report from Just OK Jessica and also we talk about whether sparse is a word, it is, and el Sooper laughs a whole lot at the White House press secretary. He says something probably racist about immigrants and then yells at people to get some scruples, stop watching movies on smaller screens because you’re destroying Western society dammit. There’s also a little sports talk, sorry people, but el Sooper almost killed an NFL player and he feels really bad about it. GO ENJOY!!!

THIS WEEK we have pretty bad quality for el Sooper and great audio quality for Jess, we're very sorry. We'll fix it on the next one. BUT THIS WEEK we talk about the Bills game that Sooper went to, and also some Martha's Vineyard craziness and also general immigration comments and also whether Atlanta is better than Boston, also why the Kaepernick thing is dumb and also why a lot of other things are dumb!! It's SOOO fun!! Also how Jess's quarterback did something dumb that she didn't see because she doesn't even watch her games. Amazing. GO LISTEN!!

THIS WEEK we have a MATT and we don't have a JESS!! We talk a little bit about politics but we mostly do the pop culture documentaries and shows on the streaming. So there are a lot of spoilers, sorry!! Avoid those, but enjoy the podcast. Also we talk about Dr. Oz. And comic book movies and how animals are AMORAL rapists and MURDERERS. And comic book nerds. It's great, GO LISTEN RIGHT NOW.