Neurons that fire together, wire together. It's important that the information we learn is cemented into our neural pathways so we can access it, even during times of stress. This episode talks through the neuroscience and how to strengthen our pathways in this way.

In times of stress, we go back to what we know. When stressed, your brain's only goal is to keep you safe and try to survive. We don't have additional energy to try new things, remember novel information, or learn something different. What always feels safest to us is being in control. That usually means punishment, yelling, manipulation, and coercion.

There's such a misunderstanding of power and control, and we often think that if we allow our kids to have control, that means they take ours or we don't have it anymore. This graphic gives a good illustration of a new concept in this understanding.

The need for control shifts from needing to control my kids to needing to control myself.

To strengthen our neural pathways:
1. Choose one behavior
2. Think about it, plan it out in your mind, rehearse a different response, read about it, listen to podasts
3. Put it into practice

Over time, those different neural pathways will start to take over the old ones and make it easier to feel good about the changes we're making and give us a new foundation to build on and add other behaviors.

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