Spiritual Dope

Brandon Handley & Guests

Diving into Spiritual highs, how connecting with source energy takes you & your life to a brand new level.... and how you use that focused energy to live a life of fulfillment. read less
Religion & SpiritualityReligion & Spirituality

Episodes

Choosing Proactive Wellness: Avoiding Mental Breakdowns on the Spiritual Dope Podcast
18-10-2023
Choosing Proactive Wellness: Avoiding Mental Breakdowns on the Spiritual Dope Podcast
Welcome back, spiritual dope! It's been a while since our last episode, but I'm here, Brandon Handley, ready to dive into some thought-provoking content just for you. But first, let's set the record straight - your well-being is our top priority. Spiritual Dope is still going strong, hosting a treasure trove of interviews and discussions with individuals who have embarked on their spiritual journeys. What makes our podcast unique is that we approach spirituality through the lens of integrating it into our daily lives. Trust me, you won't find another podcast quite like this.  Today, we're exploring the idea of awakening to yourself - growing into your spiritual being and realizing the vastness of your spiritual body beyond just your physical form. It's about creating a new model for living and doing so intentionally. Many people wait until they hit rock bottom before making this shift, but why not choose to awaken sooner? It's like proactive wellness - focusing on mental health and well-being to prevent falling apart down the road. We've been taught to hold it all together, to suppress and repress our emotions, but that's not the path to true happiness. What if you could learn to find joy and contentment in your current circumstances? That's the shift we're discussing today. We'll delve into the misconception that happiness has to look a certain way, driven by media and marketing. The truth is, happiness already exists within us, waiting to be realized. And hey, even an old beat-up car can bring just as much happiness as a shiny new one! Join me as I share personal stories and insights, discussing how embracing our true selves and acknowledging our experiences can lead to genuine happiness. We'll explore the interconnectedness of all living beings and the energy that binds us together. Get ready for an episode that will uplift your spirits and challenge your perception of happiness. So sit back, relax, and let's dive into this spiritual dope together!
Transformative Journeys: Healing Trauma and Overcoming Addiction with Psychedelics
30-07-2023
Transformative Journeys: Healing Trauma and Overcoming Addiction with Psychedelics
On this episode of Spiritual Dope, host Brandon Handley welcomes guest Jahan Khamsehzadeh to explore the transformative power of psychedelics and their role in spirituality and personal growth. They delve into the cultural changes of the 1960s that brought about the use of psychedelics and discuss how these substances have been used in tribal ceremonies for centuries and are now being integrated into Western psychotherapy and recreational settings. The episode emphasizes the importance of having the right container to navigate these expansive states of consciousness safely, as well as the necessity of education and strategic planning for safe psychedelic use. Jahan shares their personal journey from a former atheist to experiencing a profound shift in consciousness through psychedelics, leading to a complete transformation in their perspective and the trajectory of their life. They also touch upon the challenges and rewards of working with psychedelics in therapeutic settings, including the processing of past trauma and the potential for healing and overcoming harmful behaviors. The episode highlights the need for set and setting and emphasizes the importance of having someone present to support individuals experiencing disorienting effects. Jahan and Brandon also explore the deep history of psychedelic use worldwide and the ongoing movement to decriminalize these substances. The episode concludes with a discussion on the therapeutic benefits of psilocybin mushrooms and the potential role they played in the evolution of human consciousness. Drawing from various psychological models and the work of pioneers like Stanislav Grof, they explore the different stages of the psychedelic experience and how understanding these stages can aid individuals in navigating challenging experiences and embracing personal growth and transformation. Tune in to this episode of Spiritual Dope to deepen your understanding of psychedelics' role in spirituality, healing, and human evolution.   Connect with Jahan: https://psychedelicevolution.org/
Unveiling the Profound: Near-Death Experiences and Spiritual Insights with Nicole Kerr
17-07-2023
Unveiling the Profound: Near-Death Experiences and Spiritual Insights with Nicole Kerr
On this episode of Spiritual Dope, host Brandon Handley is joined by guest Nicole Kerr, who shares her incredible near-death experiences and the profound spiritual insights she gained from them. Nicole begins by recounting the emergency surgery she underwent after a car crash, which led to multiple near-death experiences due to fluid in her lungs. She vividly describes feeling suffocated and believing her oxygen was being taken away. Thankfully, a diuretic was administered as a last resort, saving her from suffocating to death. Nicole woke up with a ventilator after one of the surgeries, deeply realizing that there is no pain at the moment of death. Nicole shares her belief in a dimension where angels and deceased loved ones exist on the other side. She encourages listeners to ask for help from these angels and develop a relationship with them. As a self-proclaimed recovering people pleaser, Nicole delves into the fear-based roots of people pleasing and how it was exacerbated by her time at the Air Force Academy, where she faced constant hazing and harassment. Nicole opens up about a traumatic car accident where she was pronounced dead at the scene but revived, leading to her struggle with an eating disorder and self-blame. She speaks about her strained relationship with her father, who blamed her for the accident and has not forgiven her. However, Nicole also shares a powerful incident where an angel saved her after another car accident, referring to the angel as "Casper the Ghost." In her soul form, she overheard a conversation between angels, who emphasized the importance of asking for help and promised that help would come. Describing her near-death experience, Nicole explains being engulfed in a white light that exuded love, comfort, beauty, and unconditional love, struggling to find words to fully convey the experience. She advises listeners to find what works for them, whether it's prayer, talking to their guardian angel, or journaling to reflect and connect with their soul. Nicole emphasizes the need to expand emotional literacy and express emotions instead of suppressing them. Nicole's personal experience of abuse at the United States Air Force Academy deeply influenced her focus on the spiritual dimension of health and her desire to change society's negative perception of death. She believes that death is often associated with doom, gloom, and negativity, and urges listeners to address their fear of death, as preparation is essential. Furthermore, Nicole highlights the importance of both spiritual and physical preparation for death and mentions how belief systems shape our relationship with death. She shares a poignant story about a six-year-old girl who had a negative concept of God due to fear of hell, underscoring the need to examine and change beliefs that no longer serve us. The episode touches on the speaker's reunion with a former roommate after 39 years, the blame they both carry surrounding the crash, and the importance of communication and rebuilding relationships. Nicole also details her struggles with soul loss after the crash and the subsequent physical and emotional issues she faced, including compulsive behaviors and chronic health conditions. She advocates for soul retrieval as a healing tool, especially for veterans struggling with soul loss, as it is often absent from their treatment. With her profound near-death experiences and spiritual insights, Nicole Kerr delivers a captivating episode full of hope, healing, and a deep understanding of the spiritual dimensions of life and death. Tune in to this enlightening episode of Spiritual Dope to explore the transformative power of near-death experiences and the importance of connecting with our souls.   www.nicolekerr.com   - Introduction to Nicole Kerr and her near-death experiences - The speaker's experience of emergency surgery and multiple near-death experiences - The speaker's belief in a dimension with angels and deceased loved ones - Encouragement to ask for help from angels and develop a relationship with them - The speaker's journey as a recovering people pleaser and the fear-based nature of people-pleasing - Recollection of the speaker's time at the Air Force Academy and experiences of hazing and harassment - The speaker's panic attack and struggle with fear of failure and shame - The traumatic car accident and the speaker being pronounced dead at the scene and revived - The speaker's fear of God and punishment due to religious upbringing - Overcoming fear of death through near-death experience - The speaker's eating disorder and self-blame for the accident - Strained relationship with the father and his lack of forgiveness - Experience of an angel saving the speaker after a car accident - Soul form and conversation between angels emphasizing the importance of asking for help - Description of near-death experience as being in a white light and the struggle to define it - Suggestions for connecting with guardian angels through prayer, dialogue, and journaling - Reflecting on the soul and understanding its communication through the non-dominant hand technique - Historical context of diseases brought by missionaries to Hawaii - Importance of breathing for regulating panic and anxiety attacks - The four domains of health: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual - Importance of healthy eating and proactive stress management - The need for emotional expression and expanding emotional literacy - Personal experience of abuse at the Air Force Academy and its impact on spiritual health - Changing society's negative perception of death and the importance of preparing for it - The impact of lack of preparation and communication on families and relationships - The need for spiritual and physical preparation for death - How beliefs about God shape one's relationship with death - Experience working with a child with a negative concept of God - Sabotaging goals and unhealthy behaviors due to belief systems that no longer serve us - Personal story of reuniting with a roommate after many years and working on their relationship - Attempts to leave the hospital and the speaker's growth from the experience - Experience of soul loss after the crash and its symptoms - The speaker's struggle with soul loss and chronic health conditions - Soul retrieval as a healing tool and its relevance for veterans and preventing suicide.
The Impact of Energy: Desire for Change and Personal Growth
11-07-2023
The Impact of Energy: Desire for Change and Personal Growth
Join us on this episode of Spiritual Dope as we explore Ken's reflections, experiences, and insights that will leave you inspired and questioning your own spiritual journey. Ken traded in his corporate life and expat lifestyle overseas for a new adventure. He now travels the country with a microphone, a van, and a jar of questions, sharing his experiences. This epic trip may seem crazy to some, but to Ken, it is a brave decision. It is not the first time he has taken a bold step in his life, as he previously uprooted his family and moved from Los Angeles to Hong Kong for a two-year job opportunity at the age of 39. Returning back to his home country may not be as extreme, but it is still an exciting and unconventional choice for Ken. (connect with Ken here: www.thejar.live   Topics covered in this audio session: - Reflecting on a successful leader who built a company from scratch - Description of the leader as an evangelist with exceptional communication skills, strategy, and ability to connect with others - Acknowledgment of similarities with the leader but not achieving the same level of success - Vulnerable moment when the leader asks who fills their cup - Referencing emotional support and inspiration received from others - Reflection and frustration about someone's actions - Discussion about the impact of energy on desire for change and personal growth - Journey overseas and facing challenges when family and connections were no longer present - Difficulties of constant transitions and inability to establish deep relationships - Desire to return home and reconnect with family and friends - Mention of starting to write and taking up the guitar at the age of 52 - Importance of finding ways to receive appreciation and gratitude from others - Recognition of love and kindness shown by others - Balancing receiving and giving, comparing it to filling one's cup - Emphasis on finding motivation and practicing self-gratitude - Warning against people who expect others to fill their cup - Experience of someone approaching the speaker after scanning a QR code on a van - Discussion about making a positive impact - Desire to make a positive impact when the speaker is 80 years old - Appreciation of food, family, and friends - Desire to contribute to the world, society, heart, and soul - Acknowledgment of not knowing the answer yet, but valuing the question - Encouragement to meet curious people and recognize signs of curiosity - Love for music and appreciation of songwriters - Return to photography as a serious pursuit - Intentionality in writing, playing guitar, and doing photography - Realization of the impact these activities had - Challenge of the speaker's title preventing them from speaking in certain settings - Writing letters to God turned into a podcast - Purpose of hearing people's stories and giving them a platform - Fulfillment in listening to people's stories - Specific experience meeting a woman in a trailer park with a difficult backstory - Appreciation of being listened to and having her story valued - Reflection on taking a break after working for eight months straight - Limited time off and constant uploading and editing of content - Realization of a common theme in the work: mental health - Faced with a decision among multiple outcomes, excluding the red one - Captivation and confusion regarding the red one in a crowded room - Confidence gained through advice received - Friendship formed with a guitar teacher in Bangkok - Writing songs together using material from a book called "Dear God" at first, but eventually running out and having to write new lyrics
Martin Theis, Shamanic Journeys: Guided Pathways to Self-Realization and Spiritual Awakening
06-07-2023
Martin Theis, Shamanic Journeys: Guided Pathways to Self-Realization and Spiritual Awakening
Martin Theis stumbled into shamanism by chance when his best friend attended a workshop at the urging of his girlfriend. Intrigued by the concept of finding one's spirit animal through a totem animal journey, Martin embarked on his own spiritual journey. Prior to this, he had no involvement with spirituality and felt disconnected from the world. Martin specializes in drum-based shamanism, without the use of medicinal plants. He recognizes that there are various approaches and traditions within shamanism, such as plant or medicine-based practices. His mentor, who practices Southern American shamanism from the Peruvian Andes, introduced him to a different interpretation of the medicine wheel. Despite the variations, Martin found resonance in the teachings from the Lakota and chose to remain with that lineage. After returning to Germany, Martin continued to learn and grow under the guidance of his original mentor, who he has been with for over ten years. https://www.lighttrails.co/webinar-series/   On this episode of Spiritual Dope, host Brandon Handley welcomes guest Martin Theis to discuss their unique approach to life coaching through shamanic journeys. Martin explains how these journeys connect with the subconscious, higher self, and guidance, allowing clients to receive answers, guidance, and healing. Unlike traditional coaching, Martin emphasizes that they do not give instructions but instead focus on the client's stated intention. They believe strongly in this transformative work, as it helps individuals find their own solutions, tapping into the answers they already possess. Martin shares their own spiritual journey, highlighting the struggles and disconnection they experienced before discovering shamanism. They delve into the different approaches to shamanism, including plant-based or medicine-based journeys and the use of a drum. Martin's specific teachings come from Southern American shamanism from the Peruvian Andes, which incorporates unique power and transformational processes. They also touch on the importance of self-care for empathetic individuals and how to hold space for others without losing energy. Martin discusses the significance of shamanism in reconnecting with nature and spirituality, especially in Western cultures where spirituality has been lost. They emphasize the importance of breathing techniques in dealing with negative events and sensations in the body. Martin also shares their webinar offering, the 16-week system they use to work with individuals on specific intentions and shamanic journeys. Through their personal story of struggle and self-doubt, Martin highlights how shamanic journeys have the potential to help individuals in profound ways. Join Brandon and Martin as they dive deep into the transformative power of shamanic journeys on this episode of Spiritual Dope.
Unveiling the Power of Oneness: Stuart Adam Discusses Plant Medicine and Personal Transformation
12-06-2023
Unveiling the Power of Oneness: Stuart Adam Discusses Plant Medicine and Personal Transformation
Unveiling the Power of Oneness: Stuart Adam Discusses Plant Medicine and Personal Transformation Hosted by Brandon Handley, featuring guest Stuart Adam In this episode of Spiritual Dope, Brandon Handley interviews Stuart Adam, an explorer of plant medicine and spirituality for 15 years. They delve into the importance of finding spiritual harmony in a chaotic world. Stuart emphasizes the significance of intuition, oneness, and understanding the duality of the shadow and the light. He opens up about his personal journey, including struggles with drug addiction and a lack of understanding in how to treat women properly. Stuart has since found solace in his engagement to a supportive partner who has helped him confront his own darkness. The key takeaway is the necessity of working through personal darkness to ultimately discover the light. Discovering Oneness through Plant Medicine Stuart's experiences with plant medicine have revealed the interconnectedness of his shadow and light aspects. He passionately embraces the concept of oneness, emphasizing that we are all connected and part of a divine existence. Verbal explanations fall short; true understanding comes through experiencing this profound connection. Stuart's spiritual practices involve working with powerful plants like ayahuasca, fire, and water, building relationships based on gratitude and respect. He engages in daily prayer, receiving guidance from these sacred entities. The focus is on being present and transcending mental obstacles, creating a meditative and experiential practice. Prayer: Balancing Masculine and Feminine Energies The conversation explores prayer as a blend of masculine and feminine energies. The masculine aspect involves taking action, asking, and doing, while the feminine aspect centers around receiving, being present, and surrendering without striving for specific outcomes. Trust and letting go are essential elements. Stuart acknowledges the challenges faced by white males in the spiritual realm, but encourages rising above negativity. Surrender and the power of feminine energy, symbolized by yin, are further discussed. The conversation also touches on religion and Kabbalah, highlighting the pursuit of an individual spiritual path, navigating the ethereal realms, and surrendering to the infinite. Healing Ancestral Burdens and Finding Oneness The podcast acknowledges the speakers' Jewish lineage and their struggle to feel connected to it. They delve into the complexities of Kabbalah and how it has contributed to many Jews feeling disconnected from their bodies. The importance of personal healing, releasing ancestral burdens, and finding individual paths to oneness is emphasized. While recognizing the potential benefits of plant medicine, it is stressed that integration and inner work are necessary to fully experience its transformative effects. The discussion also addresses concerns about unqualified individuals serving plant medicine, underscoring the importance of finding a trustworthy spiritual teacher. Embracing Personal Sovereignty and the Power of Prayer Stuart highlights the need to stop relinquishing power to others and start trusting oneself. Connecting with personal sovereignty is essential to becoming one's own navigational system. Prayer is presented as a tool to cultivate trust and create a container for self-discovery. Stuart offers an eight-week journey, guiding individuals on how to pray and trust themselves. The focus is on living one's prayer and witnessing its manifestations in everyday life. The ultimate goal is to develop a profound sense of personal power and sovereignty. Throughout the conversation, the hosts pose various questions to Stuart, including inquiries about his preferred dishes to cook for friends and who should reach out to him. Stuart mentions his garden and growing tobacco for spiritual addiction clearing. Listeners are directed to visit his website, TheAlchemyOfPrayer.com, to embark on a personal spiritual growth journey. The conversation maintains a relaxed tone while offering thought-provoking insights.
Breathing Away the Shadows: Unleashing Inner Power through Breathwork in Recovery
30-05-2023
Breathing Away the Shadows: Unleashing Inner Power through Breathwork in Recovery
Welcome to the Spiritual Dope podcast, where we dive deep into the realms of spirituality, personal growth, and transformation. I'm your host, Brandon, and I'm excited to embark on this journey with you. In today's episode, we have a special treat as I step away from the usual group format and share a personal experience that left a profound impact on me. Picture this: I rented a car and drove an hour just to share the practice of breathwork with a group of individuals in recovery. And here's the kicker—I wasn't getting paid for it. This got me reflecting on the question, "What would you do if you had a million dollars?" or even more importantly, "What would you do purely out of love, passion, and the desire to make a positive impact?" During this episode, I want to delve into the incredible power of breathwork and its potential as a tool for healing and empowerment, particularly in the context of addiction recovery. We'll explore how breathwork can help us connect with our inner power, find comfort and safety within ourselves, and tap into a space that's often sought through addictive behaviors. Join me as we unravel the beauty and significance of this transformative practice and its ability to bring light into the lives of those on the path of recovery. So, whether you're new to breathwork or a seasoned practitioner, whether you're in recovery or simply seeking personal growth, get ready for an enlightening conversation that explores the depths of the human spirit and the power we possess to create positive change in our lives. Let's dive into the world of Spiritual Dope and uncover the magic that lies within each and every one of us.
Carlos Tanner: Addiction to Ayahuasca Enlightenment
15-05-2023
Carlos Tanner: Addiction to Ayahuasca Enlightenment
Spiritual Dope Podcast: Carlos Tanner's Ayahuasca Journey In this episode of the Spiritual Dope podcast, Carlos Tanner, founder of the Ayahuasca Foundation, shares his incredible journey from addiction to enlightenment through Ayahuasca. He discovered the power of plant medicine after hitting rock bottom and receiving a life-changing email from a friend inviting him to experience Ayahuasca in Peru. Carlos Tanner's Transformation Carlos ventured to Peru and became a student of Don Juan, a healer who taught him about plant medicine. After four years of learning, recording, and documenting his experiences, Carlos realized that he could have learned faster with the right educational materials. This realization led him to start the Ayahuasca Foundation and create a retreat center to share his knowledge and help others learn about plant medicine safely and effectively. Founding the Ayahuasca Foundation Despite facing numerous challenges, such as living with Don Juan's large family and adapting to a different culture, Carlos persisted in his mission to share his knowledge. After meeting other shamans and finding a mentor in Don Enrique Lopez, Carlos finally established the Ayahuasca Foundation to teach others about plant medicine. Life in Peru and the Plant Medicine Community Although living in the Peruvian Amazon isn't for everyone, some people have made it work by starting businesses in agriculture and joining the community of retreat centers like the Ayahuasca Foundation. The plant medicine community is not just about getting high; they are serious about exploring the depths of healing through Ayahuasca and other medicinal plants. The Importance of Cleansing and Respecting Ayahuasca Carlos emphasizes the importance of cleansing your digestive system before taking plant medicines and ensuring good digestion and nourishment. The purification process is crucial for removing toxins and purifying various systems in the body. Ayahuasca has become popular, but sustainable harvesting and respecting the sacred nature of the plant should be a priority. Carlos can be reached through the Ayahuasca Foundation website or social media platforms. Action items:Consider questioning more and not being afraid to think differently.Look into the Ayahuasca Foundation and the healing tradition of the Amazon.Insights:The world is slowly waking up to what some already know inside.The Ayahuasca Foundation was founded to spread the science of plant medicine back into the world.Practical applications:Embrace questioning and thinking differently.Research and potentially explore the healing tradition of the Amazon through the Ayahuasca Foundation.
Troy Hadeed: The straight-talking yogi, serving up cosmic insights
04-05-2023
Troy Hadeed: The straight-talking yogi, serving up cosmic insights
Troy and Brandon are talking about the power of breath extension in their lives, and how it makes them feel so connected to the big man upstairs. And let's be real, who doesn't want to feel connected to God? But here's the thing, folks, manifestation is just a fancy new age word for prayer. It's all the same damn thing. So if you're out there trying to manifest your dream life, just know that you're really just praying for it. It's mind-blowing. So go ahead and check it out, and you'll be like, "f*ck yeah, this is some good shit."   Connect with Troy over at: https://troyhadeed.com/ - Troy: When we create space in our life to actually quiet in mind and be with the breath, that space transcends into our life. He says it's important for listeners to set time aside to be with themselves and their breath. Troy: For it to be loving and holistic, quality time and intimacy is essential. - The only thing that can tame your mind is your breath. We aren't often in relationship with the mind, so we're often a puppet in mind. If we can cultivate a relationship to mind, we can reprogram our conditioning. How do we make sure we're working from a place of love and not as complete robots? - How did you find yourself fulfilling your purpose? You've been doing this yoga practice for 15 years. How have you been able to find yourself as being successful? By following your passion, your bliss, et cetera. - When we talk about purpose, we think of a larger dream or a larger vision for our lives. But to make that dream and vision a reality, you have to be in your purpose in each and every moment. If you get overly obsessed with that larger dream, you're going to miss your purpose.
Joshua Bloom: Reflection and Intention, Unlocking True Potential
22-03-2023
Joshua Bloom: Reflection and Intention, Unlocking True Potential
Welcome to another exciting episode of our podcast, where we explore spirituality and personal growth with industry experts. In today's episode, we are thrilled to have an enlightening conversation with Brandon Handley and Joshua Bloom. They discuss the importance of embracing one's spiritual identity, integrating spirituality into everyday life, and understanding quantum energy healing. Joshua Bloom is a renowned expert in the field of spirituality and quantum healing. With his vast experience, he has helped countless individuals unlock their potential and achieve personal growth through spirituality. You can find Joshua online through his website at https://www.quantumenergycenter.tv/ and on social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Join us for this insightful conversation and embark on a journey to deepen your spiritual growth and discover new ways to overcome life's challenges. Listen in and let us know your thoughts in the comments below! Summary Introduction of the episode. 0:00 What does quantum energy transformation mean? 0:43 Being the giver and the giver. 7:51 Finding a location for furniture. 12:37 Turning over a new leaf. 19:10 What is the power of choice? 24:06 How do you know what you need to change? 29:54 The bell curve of love energy. 34:16 What is the quantum energy scale? 38:43 What are we also afraid of? 43:16 Intro Guy 0:00 Your journey has been an interesting one up to hear you've questioned so much more than those around you. You've even questioned yourself as to how you could have grown into these thoughts. Am I crazy? When did I begin to think differently? Why do people in general appear so limited in their thought process? Rest assured, you are not alone. The world is slowly waking up to what you already know inside yet can't quite verbalize. Welcome to the spiritual dough podcast, the show that answers the questions you never even knew to ask, but knew the answers to questions about you this world the people in it? Most importantly, how do I proceed? Now moving forward? We don't even have all the answers, but we sure do love living in the question. Time for another head of spiritual day with your host Brandon Handley. Let's get right into today's episode. Brandon Handley 0:43 One Hey, there's spiritual dope I'm on here today with number one best selling author Joshua bloom, he's the author of the ultimate answer is inside. Creator of quantum energy transformation, mastery of the quantum shift and founder of quantum energy center LLC, as the internationally acclaimed trusted authority on quantum transformation number one best selling author and the executive producer of the ultimate answer is inside movie with upcoming companion book. And the creator of quantum energy transformation. Josas sold Joshua's sole purpose and passion is to empower and pass and Intuit is to unlock and own their authentic power and turn their potential into lasting paradigm shifts. Josh was so great to have you on as we were just talking before we got going here with this has been there's been in motion for a while. So so glad we can finally get together in person. Joshua Bloom 1:37 Yeah, thank you for having me. I'm excited. Absolutely. So Josh, Brandon Handley 1:41 I usually like to start these with the whole idea, right? That, look, you and I were like universal conduits for just like the energy, right? It's just flows through us. And the people listening to our conversation, right? They're gonna hear something that you and I aren't even finally even talking about, right? You and I will have our conversation, and somebody tuning in is going to hear something else entirely. There's gonna be a message that's coming through you being delivered by the universe right now to that person's tune. And what's that message person today, Josh? Joshua? Joshua Bloom 2:16 Well, that anything is possible that we have the ability to create change at the quantum level, to allow ourselves to, in a sense, upgrade or up level ourselves to a new possibility that maybe we haven't even discovered yet or thought about yet. And allowing ourselves to reach potentials that we never thought we'd be able to do during our lifetime. Brandon Handley 2:43 I love that. I love that. And I think that those people who go through certain shifts, they find that for themselves. And my guess is that you've you've kind of got you've got a process and how we get there, and how can people reach that in a systematic way? When you say Quantum? So what do you mean, because I think a lot of people hear quantum and they don't know what to do with it. Joshua Bloom 3:06 I totally agree with you. People use the word Quantum. And they actually use it in a way that doesn't actually mean what quantum means. I'm glad you asked the question, because a lot of people are putting the word quantum on to things because it either sounds cool, or it's gonna make the money. But the truth of the matter is that quantum means cellular. So that means when you're talking about quantum healing, or what I call quantum energy transformation, that means we are making a shift making a change at the cellular level of the body. And we're doing so at the smallest part of us, that has consciousness. And when you make that shift, when you make a change, at that level, it upgrades or up levels, your identity. So when I work with a client, for example, they might come in as one person and leave at the next level of who they get to be. Yeah, Brandon Handley 4:01 yeah, that sounds great. I would like that machine or that capability, right? Like, let's walk in. Let's walk in here. I'm gonna need a 2.0. As I walk out the door, the better improved version of myself, as we were talking a little bit to, you know, your best selling author, congratulations. I mean, it's it's no small feat to put a good book together. I think anybody can put a book together and just slam it out there. Right. It's another thing to get, you know, be well received and actually help people with it. You mentioned too, that you did some work with us, Bruce Lipton had endorsed your book is, is he a part of your story on how you got to where you are today? Give me a little insight there. Joshua Bloom 4:46 Well, he's definitely part of my story in the sense that I was having a lot of anxiety, so much so that most people would have been on medication for like years. I was having so much anxiety that I would, it would be fearful for me to even like walk outside and walk around my house outside. At times, it was like, you know, 21 years ago. And when I was in this place, it was it was really difficult to determine how was I going to get out of this place? Is this going to be the way that I was gonna live my life for the rest of my life? Or was this going to be something that I could shift and change should actually never believe that I was going to be able to change this, I thought, actually, this was it, this was the way that I was going to be. And I was gonna either have to deal with it, or try to get help. So I worked on learning, that was my main mode for moving myself forward, I learned so much, I learned about 20 different healing modalities, most of which I became certified in. And still I couldn't shift my issues. And it was very, very difficult, until I started to work at a Hypnosis Center. And I Well, the reason I went to the Hypnosis Center in the first place was for them to help me but I had learned so much that I had surpassed what they were doing in the hypnosis session with me that I realized they were not going to be able to help me at all. But I thought, well, maybe I can help them. So I started to work for the Hypnosis Center. And I started to do sessions. And I was getting these really amazing changes in people that I was seeing right before my eyes. So somebody would come in with anxiety, and all of a sudden, their anxiety would be gone. I'd go home with mine, but they would leave without theirs. And I'm like, wow, I must know something because I mean, something is happening. And I would see people that would come in with things like fibromyalgia, migraine, headaches, pain, all sorts of things like this. And they would be leaving without their issues. And of course, it was really difficult for me, because I was going home with my issues every night, saying, I must, this must be a disconnect here. I'm obviously getting it for other people, but I'm not getting it for me. So after a while, I started to realize I could use the same understanding the same quantum understanding that that I learned from Bruce Lipton, because that's one of the that's one of the learnings I got was with Bruce Lipton taught me so many powerful things that led me to understand how to make those changes with those people. And I understood the science behind it all, I never would have been able to create a quantum energy transformation or create the changes that I've helped people do so profoundly. Yeah, I think the biggest one was me. I mean, I was my most definitely my most difficult client. Brandon Handley 7:51 So it's interesting, right? I always make this line about the being the giver and the gifts, the gift and the giver type of thing. And so you were able to give this gift to everybody else, but you weren't able to give it to yourself or like I'm just thinking like, again, we talked about being conduits of energy for like everybody else, you were able to receive it and deliver it for others. But you didn't have an awareness of how do I apply this to myself? Yeah, Joshua Bloom 8:22 well, I was able to help them shift the energy at the cellular level of the body to create that change. And I taught them exactly how to do it. And they were able to do it. But when I did it for myself, I was too disconnected. So So here's the thing, Dr. Bruce Lipton says that if you are in growth, you can transform and heal. And if you're in, if you're in protection, you can't. Brandon Handley 8:50 So the anxiety was asking as a barrier, the anxiety, Joshua Bloom 8:53 he put me in protection, like 24/7. Even now, when I work with other people, I was able to help them get into growth, not the problem. But getting myself into growth, I needed another Joshua to Brandon Handley 9:09 kind of like tickling yourself, right? Like you can't, it's really hard to tickle yourself. There's no Joshua, like, I got you. Joshua Bloom 9:16 But I finally did, I finally learned how to get into my body, how to connect with myself, how to move that energy at the cellular level of the body for myself, which was much harder than helping other people by the way. I did it. And I released all of those things. But I definitely say that Bruce Lipton helped me understand the science behind the cellular transformation. So that it let me create such amazing shifts for people. Brandon Handley 9:46 Not as powerful and I think that I think that's really important. There's always the it's almost always easier to help others with their problems and what they're going through and because you're Though you're, you're not attached to their shit, right? You don't have their emotional, you don't have their baggage, right? So you can be like, Look, I actually see you as you actually are. And here's the reflection of who you actually are like, Oh, well, thank you so much. I can go now I'm good, I think right? And but looking at yourself in a mirror, you see the same thing like all the time you never really see the truth of who you are. Joshua Bloom 10:24 Yeah, when we get in our own way, really easy. Brandon Handley 10:27 Yeah. So you, you're just anxious character. You finally figure out like how to heal yourself. And you're taking the show on the road? Right? Where's where's the I guess transition where you said, Alright. I can roll out of this Hypnosis Center. We've helped each other out well enough from here. I'm good to strike out on my own. Tell a little bit about that story. Yeah, Joshua Bloom 10:55 well, I was working for hypnosis. And I was making lots of money. I was helping people tremendously. I was still holding on to a lot of my issues. I had made it a little bit better, but not really at that time. And so that I that I had this argument with the lady that owned the center. I mean, never had an argument before. But she got into this energy that I didn't like, and I didn't think she was being fair. And I look at it now as the universe was saying, Joshua, you need to get out of this place needed to open up your own center. Sure. So but I didn't see it. At that exact moment. I thought, you know, this lady is just being unfair to me what's going on? And then, when I decided to leave, which was after that argument, I didn't have anywhere to go, I went home. Brandon Handley 11:49 It was gonna take my thing and leave now. Joshua Bloom 11:52 Yeah, exactly. So I took my stuff with me. And I had a lot of stuff there. And I took my, you know, modality they created with me to take everything with me. And I went home. And I looked for a place in which I could rent to see if I could rent some space. But I had no luck with that I couldn't I couldn't find a place in which I could rent that I could afford. I mean, I didn't have a whole lot of money. Because I was living on the money that I was that I was I was getting. And I was living in an expensive area. So it was costing a bit of much money at the time. So what ended up happening was one of my clients called me, and I see wanted to see me and I said, Well, I can't see you there because I just left. So I don't know what we're going to do. I don't really have a location to see the one. And I said, I've been looking for one for the last couple of days, and I couldn't find a location at all for anything. They're all too expensive. She says, I'll call you back in 20 minutes and hung up the phone. And I'm like, What is she talking about? So she called me back in 20 minutes. And she says, I want you to meet me at this address. And I'm like, what, why? And she says just made me there. I said, Okay, so I get in my car. And you know, now I'm anxious. Because my client for I don't know why. Brandon Handley 13:14 She picked out right, yeah. And we Joshua Bloom 13:17 get out of the car at at this location. And she says they have they have three rooms for rent for a price you can afford. And I'm like, really? So I went in and I spoke to the owner, and of the building. And he said, Yeah, we have three rooms for rent and a waiting room. They had like an office. And then they had a room where I could do classes. This is like crazy. Because I've called everybody searched everywhere did everything. And all of a sudden, here it was Brandon Handley 13:45 what you know, I mean, I know that you'd mentioned to, you know, studying a lot of things that turned out to be BS, right? What I found in this space, law of attraction, energy work, whatever. All this effort that we put out tends to get in our way. It's like, hey, universe, I don't trust you, even though you've done the rest out there to handle my shit here. So I'm just gonna go ahead and do it without you because you're not helping me. And then as soon as like, we're doing it. We're frantic, right? We don't know what I can't find a place. What am I gonna do? I can't afford where I'm at, right? This is you right? You're in a scenario. You're like, you know what universe? I fucking I give up right? Like, what I'm not gonna deal with it right now. Client now we can't get together. It couldn't possibly happen. Right? Couldn't couldn't possibly, and she's like, it's happening. And the University says, Why don't you trust me? Joshua Bloom 14:45 Yeah, and the universe provides so I took that I took that place and I didn't know who was gonna pay the next month but I figured I was just going to be able to just do this thing. I put the deposit down and I paid for it. And then I needed furniture. So I didn't have any purchase, I thought I could rent furniture that that was like, oh, yeah, I just rent it no big deal. So, I don't know if you've ever rented furniture, but it's really, really expensive. And you think, Oh, it was gonna be like $10 a month, isn't it like hundreds and hundreds of dollars a month. And so I got really stuck. And I went to a meeting to help somebody else that was going to actually meet with a weight loss clinic, who asked me to come and give them advice about their clinic and what I could help them with their with their business. So I went over there, and I walked in, and all of a sudden, I got this intuition that I should ask them if they have any furniture, which I thought was really a weird question to ask somebody, because Hi, do you have any Berger, you know? Sure. I did. And she said, I can help you with that. And then I'm looking to see behind me to see that she's talking to somebody, like, like, that was a real answer. And she said, Yeah, I can help you with that. So I came with a van to her house, and had all the furniture I needed for my, from my from, from my office. And so I got, you know, a bunch of friends. And we, we loaded up the truck. And I said, Well, what do I owe you? She says nothing. Like, if I unlocked my legs, you know, sure, Brandon Handley 16:16 ya know, Joshua Bloom 16:17 you've you came to help me that day. And then I've helped you. So Brandon Handley 16:22 I love it. And I would have an interpretation of it. But I'd love to hear kind of like, you know, as you've looked back, what, what are you feeling? What is what's the universe telling you at this point? Oh, well, everything Joshua Bloom 16:32 was falling into alignment. So it was, it was, you know, the universe had me have this argument with this woman, and who owned the Hypnosis Center. And I left for that reason. And then, you know, I mean, I don't have anything negative against this woman that at the center, we never had an argument before that, that moment, but it got me it got me to take action. So I knew it was, you know, a spirit in the universe, saying, This is what you need to do. And then everything fell into place. I got all the furniture I needed. I got the clients just came, everything just started to happen automatically. For me. I didn't have to work very hard. When we are in alignment. That's how it looks. Brandon Handley 17:13 Yeah, it is, right. I mean, I got, you know, little little tingles and goosebumps because it's so true. And it's so it's so hard to impart that was somebody that's not even looking down that alley. Right? So somebody's not looking down that alley at all, Joshua, like, what do you start? Where do you start to direct them? Joshua Bloom 17:36 Well, I direct them inward, we tend to look outside of ourselves to find our answers. And of course, my book is called the ultimate answer is inside. Instead of instead of us looking inside, we tend to look at, you know, reach searching for someone for help, or we tend to look outside of us for an answer. And truthfully, the answers are all inside of us. So when we point the arrow back at ourselves, and we say, Okay, I'm gonna now look and see what's inside here, and connect with ourselves, we start to have situations where we become in alignment like I did, where everything just start to happen, and all this goodness start to happen without a lot of effort on my part, I'm gonna walk in, again, intuition here. Do you have furniture kind of questions? Sure this happens automatically. These are the kinds of things that happen when we're in alignment. So how do you get into alignment? Well, first, you got to be connected to yourself when you're disconnected from yourself. We have all sorts of issues. First of all, anxiety like I had, some people may have depression, some people have both. Some people might have the experience of being scattered or, or not really knowing what's going on in their life. And they feel disconnected. No add today is an epidemic that is really not necessary, because we've all been taught to be out of body. So if you are out of body or in your head, you are running at fast energy. Anybody would be scattered for and from that position of energy. Sure. So it's interesting because I grew up all of my life thinking that I had Add Error. The actually, I'm a little bit older than that. So they didn't have add as a as a as a diagnosis when I was growing up in third grade. When I was diagnosed. When I was diagnosed, they they came they came at me and said you have a neurological impairment. Yeah. What's that today? That's called ADD? Sure. So that was pretty, pretty crazy to realize. I have this thing called add. And so I looked at add as a problem. And also, I had what they call dyslexia, so Difficulty and reading, which I have neither those things today. But when I had them in third grade, and fourth grade and fifth grade, until I got into high school, I was, you know, the broken kid, I was the kid who sure couldn't do anything. I was the kid who was having all this trouble until my. So what was my junior year, which became my senior year, I decided that I wasn't going to live that way anymore. And I call that turning over a new leaf. It took me several times of turning that leaf before the prep really turned, but in my in my junior year, and I became very, very organized. And I became so organized that I helped other students become organized also. And if there was a valedictorian kind of thing in my school, which there wasn't, I would have been that because they did ask me to speak at my graduation. And I went to two graduations, I went to the one my junior here, which was was, you know, I wasn't a senior yet, but I was going to college at that point. And then in my senior year, which I would put I didn't spend at school, I went to I was in college, they had they come back and speak again, also there. So that was that was a really amazing experience to realize that I could shift it all. Knowing that I don't have to live what people tell me who I am, I could decide who I choose to be. Brandon Handley 21:27 That Listen, that's a powerful story. And I think to discover that at such a young age. Yeah, yeah, that's a that's a that's a multiplayer, right there. You know, I don't think listen for myself, I don't think I started, you know, going back and looking at my stories, and started to retell them to myself in a way that was actually supportive of who I am. Right. And my life 40. Right. So what could I have done with that other 20 years? Look, I had fun during that 20 years, I'm not gonna lie. Like, what would it have been like, if I actually supported myself internally, right, with a marvelous internal scaffolding to bring to the world? Joshua Bloom 22:11 Yeah, that's the really, when I was 25, around that, that age, I learned that I didn't have to have these disabilities, the Add, and the dyslexia. I remember I was in a class, because remember, I took all these classes and stuff. I was in a class, and one of the students questioned me having a disability at all. And I was I was like, you know, so trying to prove it? No, no, you don't understand, you know, I had all this trouble. And I'm Brandon Handley 22:49 arguing for your limitations, right? Yeah. Joshua Bloom 22:51 I'm fighting for this, you know, it's really fighting for it. And as I was fighting for it, she was looking at me and says, You thing, but what have you been able to do, that other people can't do. And so I started to list them. I learned how to ski in two weeks and became an instructor, I taught myself how to play the keyboard, and I created albums for kids and, and adults and played my own music and, and produce my own music and did all this without any training at all. And then there are several other things that I've done, including creating quantum energy transformation and, and other things like this. And so she's she opened up the door there for me to look at myself, and to say, well, that doesn't sound like a learning disability. Sounds like more of an ability. And it just depends on how you choose to look at it. And she changed my life. And I realized in that moment, that I was going to do the same thing for other people that I was going to help them change their life. And using quantum energy transformation, I was able to shift all of this, I no longer experience migraine headaches, which I used to have, I don't have anxiety like I did before, I don't have the Deficit Disorder, or the or the dyslexia. So all of that's gone. And the power of that is we do get to choose who we who we get today. Brandon Handley 24:15 So let's talk about the power of choice, right? Like a lot of people think that that's like a dinner thing, right? Like, Oh, I get steak and potatoes, you get chicken, that's the choice I make in life. That's, you know, I choose to do this thing in life. Like, you know, recognizing a conscious choice, right? Let's talk just to talk a little bit about the power of choice and somebody's life and, and what you mean by that. Joshua Bloom 24:40 So when we think about choice, it's what we choose to do. However, the way that I like to look at choices at the identity level, who do I choose to be? So it's a little bit different. So I can choose choices like you were saying like a menu, or I can choose was to become someone greater than I am today. And how that looks, you know, when we look at you look at quantum quantum as the science of possibility. So when we look at the possibility of who I choose to be, can can look many different ways. You know, even in my experience of helping people today, I evolve all the time I evolve every day, from day to day, I am no longer the identity I was the day before I shift consciously and unconsciously, to become more and more of who, who I am. And I'm very authentic with my, with my students and with my clients, and I share, you know, all my stories where I fell on my face several times, and, and also how I overcame falling on my face several times as well, you know, the power of choice is really about who you choose to become. And when we take that into the quantum field, it really becomes amplified. So we tend to look at who we don't like that we are. Sure, we tend to look at that. And then whatever you focus on is what you get. So if you keep looking at yourself, and you keep looking and seeing that you don't like what you see or don't like what you feel or don't like what's going on in your life, and you feel stuck? Well, that's because our focus is hyper focused on being stuck. So in the quantum field, what we do is we get into the body, and we feel that stuck, we release that stuck, and then we focus, and we focus on a new possibility. Who else could I be instead of this anxious person that I used to be with attention deficit disorder, with anxiety and so forth? Right? Sure. Brandon Handley 26:51 Yeah. Let's, I think people might get tripped up on, you know, being greater than I am today. Right, the word greater seems to trigger people for greatness, right? What do you know who, you know, who might be great, right? Joshua Bloom 27:07 Huh? Yeah, I can do that be triggering. Brandon Handley 27:11 So, you know, what do you mean by like, you know, be greater than I am today. And I, you know, I think I was stressed too, like, when we think of the quantum field, anything is possible. And that's actually been shown, you know, scientifically, right, you know, you the possibilities, all the possibilities exist at once. Yeah, which one? Do you choose? To call forth? Kind of thing? Yeah, exactly. Right. You know, what are some of like, again, like, what is a first day student gonna learn from you? Joshua Bloom 27:50 A first day student is going to learn how to reconnect with themselves, how to get into their body, and how to stay there. Because we have habits of whoever we are at that moment. So most of us are in our head. And we're thinking, we're overthinking we're hyper focusing on the wrong things all the time. And then we get stuck in those patterns. And then someone comes along and says, Hey, you know, you shouldn't do that. And it's like, yeah, but I've been doing it for like, for so many years. And how do you stop doing that? Brandon Handley 28:23 I'm really good at this. Joshua Bloom 28:26 Exactly. So how we stop our habits, and the things that plague us, is by reconnecting with ourselves, and moving the energy at the cellular level of the body to create a quantum shift, that now no longer includes that as being me. And now I can choose something else. But we have to connect to ourselves to do that. We tend to connect to, to, like, the universe, but we tend to be like out of body looking outside of us to find the answers. The answers aren't outside of us, even though we're that's where we're looking. We have to look inside. So when you ask me, you know, what is the person going to learn, like in a first session, they're going to really learn that anything is possible, because we're going to have a release in that very first time that we meet, and you're going to experience because until you experience it is different than talking about it right. Once you experience it, you're like, oh, that's what he's talking about, that I could actually let that crap go. And I don't have to live like this anymore. Yeah, you can let it go. And yes, it is. It can be difficult for some people to do that. But when I work with you, is it there's a difference because I hold that energy, I hold that possibility for you when you can't hold it. And that's the difference. So when I'm holding all that for you, it's easy at that point to remove these energies and create a new way of living a new way of life a new way of being. Brandon Handley 29:54 Yeah, no, that's That's powerful. Definitely appreciate that. And again, you You know, you hit the nail on the head when somebody experiences it when you experience actually saw this guy for a little bit, its energy worker, and he had the best question and he says, you know, how do you know that? Um, if you're, you know, if you're a fish, how do you know that like water is what you need? All right? Have you heard this one before? No, I have not. You take them out of the water. Right? You know, because you're in it all the time. And it's not until you're separated from what you're, you've always been a part of that you, you know, you recognize that this is where you're supposed to be. Right? So you get back into the water, you're like, oh, shit, that's what I needed my entire all this time. So real similar to what you're talking about in that? Okay? Okay, we go back to that. This is how I've always been, these are my these are all my patterns, this is my life pattern is never going to change. I'm going to be anxious and all the rest for the rest of my life. You could never possibly help me. Right? You help them? And then they see just for a moment that they've been living out of the water. Right? Yeah, I should have been, I'm supposed to go back in the water. That's a reconnection to yourself feel like? Right. I'm where I'm supposed to be. And it was always available. Right? So how does it you know, how does that I think I'd even jump back a little bit to, you know, it's really tough, I think for you have to be open to the possibility in order for the shift to happen, or am I wrong? Right? Have you met somebody who's like, not open to it, and it works. Joshua Bloom 31:43 So I think there's a distinction that's really important here, which is, most people believe that you must believe in order for it to work. And I don't buy into that, that game, you do not need to believe that it will work for it to work. Actually, most people who I work with, including myself, never really believed in the first place, that it was gonna work. We hope we're hopeful. We just want it to work. But do we believe it's gonna work? No, we really don't, we don't believe anything's gonna work, really. And so you don't need to believe what's really key, though, is to be open to the possibility that this could work. You don't have to believe that it will work, but just be open to the possibility. So those people that are not open, and there are those people that are not open? Yeah, they're going to have a more difficult time, because they're not even open to considering the possibility. So then, in a sense, they're collapsing their possibilities before we even get started. So some people need some hand holding beforehand, they need need to work with them, just to get them ready. Whenever we're not even talking about making the change yet, we're talking about, let's just prepare to make the change shirt, you can just consider the possibility of being open to it. And many people who take that road with me, we we really have an amazing transformation, because they started out closed, and they end up open and moving in a direction that they never even thought they could do it themselves. Brandon Handley 33:10 Yeah. Yeah. I mean, going from I think, again, just using your own story, being this guy, you know, tied up with anxiety to where you are today. Right? I mean, I think that too, a lot of times people just they again, they look at where they're at, and they feel like that's forever. Right? Yes, true. One thing that I think is a challenge in this space is maintaining that high frequency that high vibrations, that continuous connection, you know, how do you assist people to do that? Joshua Bloom 33:45 Oh, that is a really great question. So I've been working with people for many years on how to raise your energy frequency, and that we have many different ways of doing this. You know, raising your energy frequency can be as simple as taking a shower, going for a walk barefoot, can be using tuning forks, singing bowls, toning things, things can do it. The biggest problem with this, though, is that it works like a bell curve does. So it starts at the bottom you, you let's say we use singing bowls, and the singing bowls bring you to a point where you hit a peak and now you're at the top and it's like, well, I feel really great. And then you start playing the singing bowl. Well, then that doesn't really work very well, because then it starts to go down and down and down and down and down. And then now your energy frequency has plummeted. It a really great example for that as Yoga people go into yoga for an hour and a half, and they really enjoy it and they're feeling really good. And then they stopped doing yoga and of course, same thing happens. It goes up in the peaks and then all of a sudden, you know, half an hour an hour later. You're like I wish I could do yoga again. Well, I don't have the patience for that to be honest with you. You know I and I've done yoga plenty of times, I, you know, whenever, whatever I need to do, I did. And so, you know, doing something like yoga is really great. But if you're just gonna go up and come right back down, that's not really useful. And it takes too long if I got to do 45 minutes to an hour and a half of that, just to be able to feel okay, which one time in my life, that was how it was, it's kind of it gets a rough game, because you're, you're feeling better only during the time, you're really in the yoga. And then after you get out all the anxiety comes back in. So that was a real rough game. For me. Today, what we do is we, we have very fast and very powerful energy transformations that we create by by releasing in the moment, and by raising our energy frequency. And so when we do that, we actually can raise our energy frequency to very, very high level that that instead of it going down, like I was saying the bell curve, you actually keep a good percentage of that. And now that becomes more your new energy level that you've that you've raised up to. And now we have
David Florence - Optimizing Your Life with Breath Work
15-03-2023
David Florence - Optimizing Your Life with Breath Work
Welcome to the show, I'm excited to introduce Dave Florence, the man who was driven by a bang to the head to search for better psychological and physiological health. After years of research and practice, much of which was chronicled on his YouTube channel, 'Evolution of Dave', he has created practices and protocols that have improved his mind and body and those of his clients. He is here to talk about how you can add these same methods to your daily life for more energy, a clearer and more efficient mind, a stronger body and a life experience that is in flow. Connect with Dave here: https://www.daveflorence.com/     Intro Guy 0:00 Your journey has been an interesting one up to hear you've questioned so much more than those around you. You've even questioned yourself as to how you could have grown into these thoughts. Am I crazy? When did I begin to think differently? Why do people in general appear so limited to this thought process? Rest assured, you are not alone. The world is slowly waking up to what you already know inside yet can't quite verbalize. Welcome to the spiritual dough podcast, the show that answers the questions you never even knew to ask, but knew the answers to questions about you this world the people in it? Most importantly, how do I proceed? Now moving forward? We don't even have all the answers, but we sure do love living in the question. Time for another shade of spiritual dub with your host, Brandon Handley. Let's get right into today's episode. Brandon Handley 0:42 One, there's spiritual stuff. We this is the first podcast I've recorded in the New Year. Welcome. I'm not sure when it's gonna be out there. But David and I have been trying to connect here for a bit now had to push off a little bit in December. But I've got David Florence, who I found through YouTubing and looking for 20 minute breathwork sessions, because that's all I wanted. That's all I could really tolerate in my daily day, day to day. Turns out David, you know, had some great sessions. I listened to him today, like, so it's been like six months, David, I've been listening to your stuff. So thank you for putting it out there. And he's also a Soma breath practitioner Wim Hof breath practitioner. Evolution of Dave is is your YouTube channel. And you know, you've got some really great content that's so helpful, practical, applicable to us in our current state of the world. So thanks for being on David. Hey, there's spiritual dope. Today, we change the format here just a little bit. Dave, and I got done with our conversation and some other stuff came up. And I was like, You know what, this, let's just go ahead and put this in the beginning. So it really gives you an introduction of who Dave was. Before he is who he is today, super pertinent to the listener, super pertinent to me, him the journey. And to anyone in this space, take a listen, weave it in, and then we'll jump into the regular beginnings. Right, you're saying Did you drink where you were pretty heavy drinker before doing all this stuff? And that world upside down? Vaca Dave? So you found so let me let me just I want to read this in there somewhere. So vaca Dave, and again, it's the similarities are so striking. And because when we say I used to live in a really nice neighborhood, and we owe them a nice neighborhood now, but like where I used to live, you know, nice community, we all hung out with each other all the time, we all drank and partied with each other all the time. And I used to make my own beer and my own wine, whatever. And nine times out of 10, you would see me with a beer in my hand. Right? It didn't really matter what kind of time it was or whatever. And it was. I had a water in my hand one morning, Saturday morning, neighbors like, what are you doing? Are you drinking water? I was like, Yeah, drink of water. And I was like that that was a point for me where I was like, I don't want to be known as the dad that's drinking beer all the time. Yes. You know. Right, as like, that's not that's not not what I'm about, like, so what needs to change here again. So, again, so let's just, I want to rewind a little bit there. So tell me a little bit date about bought vaca? Dave? Dave Florence 3:40 Hmm, what could Dave if I talk about him in the third person? Because that's how people would talk about actually so especially when I was living in London, people would, let's say there was a party, or some kind of event people would come up to me and say is vodka Dave coming? I go, Yeah, of course. And this is this is the thing, you know, I think people considered me boring unless I wasn't. So unless I was vodka, Dave. And I had attached that appreciation to my own psychology to a point where if it was a party or some kind of event, I could only be vodka, Dave because that was the mask that I needed in order to feel comfortable. Now luckily by today was a very fun character. He was always happy never got into any negative trouble only positive trouble. So you know, Brandon Handley 4:44 there is a certain describe positive trouble to me, Dave. Dave Florence 4:47 Well, there is a certain posh club in London that did have a very large chandelier hanging And they probably have a replacement chandelier. But at one point I was swinging from it. So it definitely was not at what you wouldn't do that anywhere anyway, let's face it, but yeah, that was my do. Yes. Yes. Yes. So yeah, I think cycle. Brandon Handley 5:25 Do you know the bank that I had? Was this a vaca? Dave incident? Dave Florence 5:31 Yes, I think it was if I know it was, but I don't know how it happened. I don't know if I was beaten up. I don't know if I fell down some steps. I have no idea. And if that five hours the night are totally lost to me. I don't know what happened during that period. Brandon Handley 5:47 Yeah, well, it again, just goes to show I think how you know, you hit on spirituality, you hit on like, you know, who we are now. Right? You and I, who we are now isn't who we've always been. There is a pathway there that not everybody wants to take. Right? You don't have to take you know, Baca days route, you don't have to take, you know, you know, Brandon, you know, drinking beer all the time route. There's a path to to this space without having to go there. But a lot of times we've been that person, we've gone through that space. And we come out we're like, and we're here now. Yes, we're very evangelical about breath, work, exercise, read, learn all you can ah, but at one point, we were gargling, you know, in the morning with Vaca, or Jim Beam or something else. And so I put that out there. Because if vaca Dave can do it, if I can do it. And I'm not saying you have to go out and stop drinking or stop from continuing doing what you're doing. But just know that that's not the end product. Right? That? Yeah, that's right. Dave Florence 7:05 I know. And also, I think, you know, there's a reason why you're doing it, you're doing it because you're unhappy with who you are. You're not You're not you haven't accepted who you are, and you're willing to present who you are to other people, there's something that needs fixing. So if you can be a drunk, and be totally happy with who you are, then maybe that's your journey, maybe that's your path. Most of the time we do this, because we don't want to be the other person. Because the other person is either too boring, or maybe hasn't got anything to say isn't fun. So yeah, that's all it really, isn't it? I think it just comes down to who do I want to be? And am I happy with this person? Do I know who this person is? Because that's what the work does. That's what the pressure. Thank you. I appreciate being here. I'm very grateful. Thank you. And thanks for your kind words. Brandon Handley 7:56 For sure, and the other the other piece I'll share with everybody before we get on David also has a Scott, a space on Facebook's got a 90 day YouTube challenge that I took and went through 90 days, I think that they've suggested that they be consecutive mine, we're not all the same. It was a great space and a great experience to be in there with Dave, as he, you know, encouraged me and many others along through the 90 Day Challenge. So David, I'd also like to thank you for that while we're here. Dave Florence 8:29 No problem. It's an interesting experience, isn't it? So for those listening? Yeah, it's I think it's actually good for anybody to do the whole idea, the premise of it was to see if we can get more people interested in putting their work out there breath work out on YouTube. But when you think about the practice itself, of committing to uploading and creating, or going live in a video every day for 90 days, the commitment itself is the crucial bit that has a knock on effect with your psychology in that you, you start to develop the real authentic, you're in front of the camera. And this is what I learned when I did the same exercise that went in front of a camera I think we all have a tendency of wearing the mask, you know, the actors masks the presenters mask. And by committing to doing this video every day, you eventually become the real authentic genuine you. But I think also what people's some people find with doing this. This exercise is yes, they start to hopefully create ideas for their content. But sometimes also people start to get a better understanding of themselves. Because once you get to a point where you no longer care, what you say, and what you look like. Often then The spilling out in this stream of consciousness flow of rambling chit chat is that you start to reveal to yourself some of the inner work, you know, you start rambling away and then it veers off in in a direction because you don't care anymore. You're not thinking about the listener and whether they find you interesting you do, you're just flowing with it. And so I think that's great. If you are creating a YouTube channel, but it's great, I think, from a psychological perspective as well, I think it can be, you know, a sort of a healing tool, if you want it to be. Brandon Handley 10:37 Sure, sure. And I love it. Everything that you're saying there resonates with me, I think one of the things that I think of when you're saying that is Bob Proctor has rip Bob Proctor. I'm not sure if you're familiar with him. But um, you know, he had this exercise, that he would say, hey, the, the problems that I have right now, I like to get them all out of my head and onto this piece of paper. Right? And so he would say, all right, are all my problems in my head? Or are they on this piece of paper? And he would, he would do this exercise until all of his problems are on like this piece of paper he gotten everything kind of dumped out in there. And and I think that I think that's that's really similar process with this, right? Like, here's, here's how I want to communicate, here's what I want to say. You've been on you. Listen to me ramble plenty of times people on this podcast have listened to me ramble plenty of times, you've got Dave Florence 11:27 beautiful rambling. Brandon Handley 11:31 I appreciate it. I appreciate it. But you find that like, there's this other tangent, like, Oh, but wait, there's just one more piece that will help make this whole. And similar to kind of what you're saying there. Right? You, you get this opportunity to to let things out that have been contained for so long. And you're like, wow, hold on a second. Not only that sounds good. Wait, did they hear what I got to say next, right, or, here's, here's who I actually am. And it's all it's all unfolding right here. So again, appreciate you creating that space and making that a possibility had had a blast. I literally just finished it at the end of the new year, as promised. So, David, let's just jump into it a little bit, right. You've got a breathwork practice. You've been doing it for quite some time. I've got a breathwork practice. I'm fairly new to it. You've got some stories I'd love to dig into. Let me just ask you. Where did you first find breathwork for yourself? And you know, what made it something that you wanted to know more about? Hmm. Dave Florence 12:35 So I had a dramatic entrance into the breathwork world. In the in 2017, I had a bang to the head. It was quite literally a bang, you know, literal Bang to the head. During a drunken night out, I lost about five hours in the night I was found by the side of the road taken hospital. It wasn't that bad, but it was enough of a bang. The next day, I wanted to do something to optimize my mind and my body. I had this, this thought of hang on a minute. I'm a father of a young child, I'm a husband, this is not how one acts, you know, and it was I was berating myself and I you know if I often say to people, you know, if I was a Catholic back in the, you know, in the Middle Ages, I would be there with my flail whipping myself, you know, it was that kind of psychology I wanted. And luckily at the time, although he wasn't that popular at the time, Wim Hof was putting out videos on cold therapy, and I thought, that's what I need. It was December it was minus 10 outside. So I went in the garden, grabbed the garden hose, poured cold water over me, was naked as well. And that's exactly what I needed. And I'm sure my neighbors did do for amusement. So, along with the cold therapy, obviously with the Wim Hof Method, they do promote breathwork and that's when I got into it. So late 2017 After two months of doing the Wim Hof Method breathwork I was hooked. So hooked, I was going through the highs that you all go through when you start doing this practice with commitment and discipline. And I was screaming from the rooftops I was telling all my friends about it. None of them would listen, obviously, I was being very evangelical. And that's when I created my YouTube channel because I wanted to tell people I was you know, I was in such a great state. I think everybody should do this is amazing. So that's when I created evolution of Dave because I saw this as being a catalyst to change. You know, I saw this as being this is me putting a stake in the ground. And I'm now going to optimize my mind and my body. Initially it was with breathwork and then a whole load of practices after that, but that was really my entrance into breathwork you know, this thing that I'm now able to look back and think that happened for a reason. You know, that was one of life's messages I needed that in order to be this. So I'm grateful for it now. Brandon Handley 15:06 I get it real similar kind of line in the sand I guess, in terms of enemas timeline of stepping into these practices myself similar, I did not fall down with a bang that ahead, but I drank enough. And I was like, Is this really? Is this really who I want my children to see? Is this really the like, I've got two boys I was like, and if they are going to use me as their model, that is just a model that I should have in front of them. And it was it was really around 2017 It's funny. But I said, you know, what? Time, you know, how can I? What changes do I want to make so that I can be a better model? If not, you know, I'm not the best. Right? But how can I be a better model offer for my children? And that was a starting point for me. So let's talk about the highs that you mentioned. What do you mean by that? Like, you know, the highs from breathwork? Or some of the other stuff? Dave Florence 16:11 Yeah, so akin to the kind of highs I would have experienced when I was a raver back in the day, you know, we're talking early 90s. You know, I would, I would do all the things without putting it into words, I would do all the things that you did when you would spend 20 hours dancing. Brandon Handley 16:37 I'm super familiar. Dave Florence 16:40 There's a lot of us out there. And so whilst they weren't necessarily the same intensity, some of the highs that I was getting, were this very elated feeling. Sort of, you know, when I was saying, you know, shouting from the rooftops, that's what I felt like doing, you know, I wanted to get outside the front of the house and go, everybody, you should do this amazing, you know, I was in that state, I didn't care what percent. But also, obviously, when I've started to push the rounds into four or five round territory by then I was doing so my breath, which I preferred, because I, you know, it was the music, the isochronic tones that enhance that experience. And I love the music because of course, that still took me back to the days of raving as well. Not that it's all like that, but you know what I mean? Some of it is with a very specific rhythm. And when you start doing the four or five rounds, you do then get these out of altered state experiences. So, you know, as you describe it like a high that that is quite a good descriptive, I suppose to that experience. You know, you're left afterwards going okay, yeah, you know, you're in a beautiful floaty state, you've had some visions, or at least visuals, albeit light, you know, during the sort of fourth and fifth round maybe. And you've you come out of it almost as if you've just been given some insight sometimes as well. Not always. But you know, sometimes you think Ah, okay, yeah, I figured something out, I think. So. Brandon Handley 18:20 You've got you've got you've got a really nice you've, I forget which one of your summer breath works that you do. But you talk about, you know, whatever is coming to you, in this moment, use this for today, what do you want this day to look like? And, you know, there are visualizations that come through, or a lot of people like to call them downloads, but these insights that they kind of come when we've been so we've been putting so much effort into life, right? And then when we sit down and we do these breathwork moments, or these breathwork, meditations, and then something comes to us, and it's so easy and effortless for like, like you said, it's like, why isn't everybody doing this? Why aren't we all talking about it? I share this breathwork with a group of guys at a sober house. i One of the things I talk to them about is say, say well imagine, you know, like you talked about going to the party doing the rave all night dance for 2020 hours or whatever. Imagine you kind of get a super similar feeling to that. But then you can get back up and go back to work. Right? Yeah. For four to eight hours, right? Like, you know, so. So I always make that joke with those guys. And like you said, these altered states of experiences. When we talk about that, and you and I've been in this rave scene, I always liken it to like, yeah, it's an altered state, but some was better, right? Because it's hyper clean. We just created it within ourselves. We are Chemical Dave Florence 20:00 factory unit pharmacy. Yeah. Brandon Handley 20:04 Yeah. And so being able to be able to do that and kind of come out of it. It's amazing. I love being able to do it, when the How are you using this to, you know, optimize your own life? What are some of the what are some of the benefits that you've received after you found it? Dave Florence 20:22 Well, interestingly, I would say three months in, of doing this kind of intense breath work every day, I realized I was beginning to develop this insatiable appetite for learning. And also, it felt like my memory had improved. At the time, I thought that was something to do with the bank to the head, you know, I genuinely thought I've had one of those, I think they call them the sort of idiot several moments where, you know, you have a bang to the head, and all of a sudden, you become this incredible artists. So I was thinking, Oh, maybe that's what's happened, something's been knocked in my right hemisphere. You know, the creative bit. But then after obviously doing more research, and that's what my journey has been about since 2017. It's you know, it's it's learning practices research, playing with it, that's crucial, from my perspective, is what I teach others, you know, it's really play with this stuff, explore experiment, and then you won't ever give up. And what I was discovering was that I was, not only did I have this insatiable appetite for learning, so I was, you know, getting book after book, but I had a capacity for remembering it as well. And this was never, I hadn't experienced this before. And then when I looked at the research, that there's various bits of research that indicate that things like spatial memory improves through doing this kind of breathwork. So I realized, okay, right, so it's down to the breath work. And that's why the breath work has been as just run like a clean vein, day after day for the last five and a bit years. Because I've always known the power of it. And then obviously, when you start exploring lots of other forms of breathwork, you realize that you can get a breath work for creating energy, you can use breath work for preparing your mind for a presentation, you can use breath work to calm the nervous system, you know, there's a whole load of different practices that you can learn that a really good for different kinds of situations. So not only did I get that sort of cognitive benefit, but then I realized I could add these into my, my imaginary toolbox. So I've got this box of tricks that I can actually return to, under given situations. But all of that, I have to say, when I'm teaching people on a one to one, quite often, what I'm saying to them is, it's all very well me teaching you this stuff. But you've got to retain it, you've got to remember it. And I think the problem that we find now in today's society is that we are awash with potential practices and ideas and methods that could optimize us that could heal us. And we pick up a book and we read it, we go, wow, that was amazing. I'm going to use that technique. And we do so for a month, and then we forget it because we've picked up another one. And we see the next shiny object. The crucial thing is when you realize and recognize that breathwork is so powerful, you got to say to yourself, right? How do I therefore make that a part of who I am? So not that I see it like a chore. In other words, I should do this, I must do this, you know that kind of psychology before then doing the breath work, you've got to figure out how do I make this a part of who I am, and how I flow through life. And that's what I realized early on that I've got to find ways of making this stuff stick. Because I want to keep this the intention was this is now me, and this is how I flow and move through life with these techniques. So I think a lot of people listening will have tried breathwork. But I would imagine there'll be lots that have probably stopped. And this this conversation will go Oh, yeah, I forgot I was doing that. Brandon Handley 24:09 Oh, sure. Sure. And I love what you're saying there too, right? We, you get to the certain point. I never, I never got to a point myself where my memory got suit a lot better. But I got to this point where people are breathwork is this insatiable desire to like learn and pull in. Pull in an amazing amount of content, right? And then one shiny object to another Oh, this will make me amazing. I'll go do this. This will make me amazing. I'll go do that. This is an you know. So that is a real challenge. How were you know, how have you been able to implement it like you're saying as a part of who you are integrated into the whole of who you are, and maintain it, like stick with it? Dave Florence 24:53 Yeah. So apologies for dying in the background. Now. I've got I've got your room. I've got a little tickle on my throat earlier today. So I decided to make myself a warm drink with honey, organic thyme, and lemon. But the cup is full of thyme seeds, and I think they went away. So anyway, they'll save you or kill you. Exactly, exactly. So how do I make this stick? Well, let me tell you what I teach others. First of all, it is this whole, looking at the intention behind it asking yourself, Why am I doing this? You know, am I doing it because it's the latest fad Am I doing it because somebody else has suggested it, am I doing it because all I just tried that experience has given me a really good high. Because if those are the reasons, you've got to look at your intention behind it, that you hear so many stories of people doing the Wim Hof Method or Soma breath three months in, they give up because their neurochemical changes have altered, their body has adapted, and they're not getting the same highs as they were before. And so therefore they give up. And of course, that tells me that their only reason for doing it was because of the highs because of these amazing feelings, when really you should look at the intention deeper. And look at the spiritual benefits the inner work that you can get from doing this practice. So when you that will be tip number one, look at breathwork as a means of developing a better understanding of yourself of knowing that these practices will have a huge physiological benefit, you know, improving your immunity, improving your circulatory system, improving your your ability to sense others and sense things. Your ability to to tap into a meditative state without meditating. You know, there's, there's so many benefits. So you need to tune into that and understand those. So that when you're doing it, you know that this any at no point? Does it feel like a chore? You know? Because again, if you start to say these words to yourself, have you've just woken up, I should do this, I ought to do this. Well, that's the wrong terminology. That's the wrong language. And that will lead you to giving up because already, you said yourself. I'm doing this for other reasons, not because it resonates not because it feels good. And then the other thing is Brandon Handley 27:31 my wake up. I wake up in the morning, and I find myself saying, oh, I should do this, I should do that. What should I be saying myself instead? Dave Florence 27:41 Well, this is where you need to, first of all understand why you're doing it. So understand the intention. And this is this is the thing you need to look at, first of all, because that's the key to have the language that you use. So Brandon Handley 28:02 what like what would be an example, then it's I guess, if my intention for the breath work is to become better in sports? What language would I use? And Dave Florence 28:13 yeah, so Well, let me tell you the language that I use. So when I wake up in the morning, I say to myself, I intend to move, breathe, flow through this day, using all the tools that I have that make me feel good or something along those lines, you know. So I know instinctively through the practice, that there are many benefits to why I do the breathwork physiological and psychological. So therefore, I at no point do I say I should do this, I ought to do it. Because I've got to a point now where my body and mind has accepted this practice. So it's, you don't even have to use the word breathwork. When you look at your intention setting in the morning, you know, I intend to flow through this day making use of all the practices I know that will enable me to do so you know, when you look at it from that external perspective of wanting to flow, reaching flow states or wanting to flow through the day, then you already know if you've been practicing it that breathwork will be one of those tools. So we'll exercise so we'll movement flow, so we'll ritual so we'll, you know, a whole load of other things. You don't need to label them all. You just need to say to yourself, I intend to flow through this day, knowing that by the end of it, I can end the day with a smile on my face knowing that I've achieved knowing that I've done the things I want to do. So you know, don't be specific about it because your body knows. If you've already connected and resonated with the breath work, then you know that that is who you are. That's what you do. You don't think before the action that is that is just who you are. So for example, when I roll Brandon Handley 29:53 out of bed Dave Florence 29:55 I roll onto the floor and I do a very easy flowing fight. Have Tibetan rites yoga routine, it's the simplest of all yoga, easy to do, and it wakes the whole body up, there's no significant stretches for you don't want to stretch too hard in the morning when you wake up anyway. And then because you breathe through that exercise that really leads me then into the breathwork. You know, at the end of the last Tibetan rites, I'm on my back, I've been breathing through every move. So I then seamlessly move from that yoga into starting off with a four, eight breathing pattern, sometimes listening to music, sometimes I don't know, just do it, you know, without any kind of influence or stimuli, I just do it. Before I then move into the cold shower and do all the other lovely things that I do. Brandon Handley 30:49 Now. I like that. So you've got you've got a basically a mantra, you wake up an intention setting for the day, that is all inclusive of like, if you say, Hey, I intend to move and breathe and flow through the day, you've already created that your mind already says, hey, that's attached to breathwork that's attached to the shower that's attached to the yoga. And if he sees himself, you know, doing this other line, right, I intend to breathe flow. And you see yourself ending that day, that way, you've created the visualization, that system mind already in action first thing of the day. Dave Florence 31:29 Exactly. So I also used initially another hat, another tool called habit stacking, I don't know if you've come across that. Brandon Handley 31:39 That's the beginning of my journey as well. It's kind of it's very funny. That was the very beginning, trying to think of the article, because I still remember the article doesn't exist anymore. But the article talks about habit stacking. And that's when I hadn't read books and like, decades, right? Like, well, if you just read like 20 pages a day, you know, get the hat, you know, and do this and do that ain't do this habit stacking. I'll let you share a little bit more about what it is. But that was that was became my journey. Have a second share more about that. David? I haven't shared it too much on this podcast at all. Dave Florence 32:16 Yeah, I mean, it's the simplest of tools, but probably one of the most powerful for getting you to do the stuff you really want to do. So all it does is taps into a mind state in which you are in a state of acceptance. In doing that one task that you're doing at the time, and really what you're doing is you are hack hacking the mind, you might say. So let's say everybody has at least one thing they do every day without fail that they know will serve them from a health perspective. Let's say brushing your teeth, for example, everybody does it. And when they do it, they don't think before they do it, they don't think oh, I've got to brush my teeth. I mean, they might do when they're a child, and they might need prodding, but when they're a child, or when they're an adult, you just do it, don't you? You don't think before you do it, you don't think whilst you're doing it, your body and mind have totally accepted that that is a good thing to do. Because it's healthy, it's good for your oral health, etc, etc. So all you do is when you're brushing your teeth, bearing in mind that at that point, your mind is in this wonderful state of acceptance. Oh, yeah, I'm just doing it doesn't you're not even thinking about it. So all you do whilst you're brushing your teeth is you say, After I brush my teeth, I will dot dot dot whatever this thing is that you want to build into your life that you know, would be good for you. That would be healthy. So let's say for example, it might be a cold shower, it could be breathwork, depending on when you brush your teeth. And so you are making use of the brain state of this acceptance brain state. And you're being aware you're tricking it because you're, you're you're saying to yourself, oh, well, whilst I'm at it, I might as well do this. You know, you're obviously in the right state at the moment, I won't tell you that I'm trying to trick you in any way. But once you're in that state, well, let's just slip a cold shower in afterwards, or let's do some breath work. So it's almost like the brain is going yeah, cool, man, you know, whatever you say, because I'm in the state of acceptance. And then you do that a few times. And that seems dialed in. Your brain doesn't then question it after a while. So and then of course, it's called habit stacking because what you then do is you go okay, let me see if I can slip another one in after this. And so you say after I brush my teeth, and after I've had my cold shower, I will dot dot dot and you add the next thing that you want to build into your life. So simple. Yeah, Brandon Handley 34:52 I think I think that what did we add in like we weren't my wife and I weren't great at making the bed. Right? I added that and and of course, you know, the admiral, whatever his name is to make your bed story. You know, I was like, Well, if I make my bed, like one of the easiest things I can do in the day, that's a win. Like, if I just start my day by winning like that, come on now. Right? So it became a game, it became part of the habit stack. So I love that. Love that you're using that now. You were able to, throughout your practices throughout all the benefits as you're optimizing yourself and your learning and your habit stacking. I don't know exactly how you came across it, but I did hear that you were able to, and I've read plenty of it, who taiko method and others to cure your asthma. Can you share a little bit about, you know, kind of how that worked out? Dave Florence 35:53 Yeah, it was, it was really cool, actually. Because when I was a child, I had a little bit of it, I definitely had a lot of things like hay fever. I became very allergic to horses, so I had to stop riding horses. And then it kind of dissipated. And I was fine as an adult until I moved to a town or city rather called bath, which is it sits in a bowl, it's surrounded by hills. And it collects all this dirty air. And whilst out running, I began to develop this
Brandon Novak
08-03-2023
Brandon Novak
I had the opportunity to meet with Brandon at one of his homes in Wilmington and ever since then he has been open with me (everyone) about his work and he agreed to do a quick sit down for this interview. Find out more about his work at https://brandonnovak.com/   Summary Brandon’s introduction. 0:00 What it’s like to not have cell phones. 1:09 Skateboarding as a drug addiction. 4:56 Praying to god to end my addiction. 9:12 Being accountable for your actions. 14:14 How to get out of your own way. 18:26 The Novak House and how it started. 23:22 The place where the misfits fit in. 27:39 Do you ever think about spiritual practice? 31:45 Dealing with death and loss. 36:25 Transcript by otter.ai   Intro Guy 0:00 Your journey has been an interesting one up to hear you've questioned so much more than those around you. You've even questioned yourself as to how you could have grown into these thoughts. Am I crazy? When did I begin to think differently? Why do people in general appear so limited in their thought process? Rest assured, you are not alone, the world is slowly waking up to what you already know inside yet can't quite verbalize. Welcome to the spiritual dough podcast, the show that answers the question you never even knew to ask, but knew the answers to questions about you this world, the people in it? Most importantly, how do I proceed? Now moving forward? We don't claim to have all the answers, but we sure do love living in the question. Time for another hit of spiritual Joe with your host, Brandon Handley. Let's get right into today's episode. Brandon Handley 0:42 Right now, when you come to mind, I did a series that was called like, sinners in the saints. Right? And I can't think of a better person, really that, you know, is that a sinner? Like missing the mark on life? Kind of right, you know, and that now you've turned it around and into something else. But let's share your journey. And for the people that don't do my kids don't even know what MTV is. First of all, right? Like, how mind boggling is that? Brandon Novak 1:09 Yeah, yeah, it's it's literally two different worlds, you know, their kids will, will grow up not even knowing or couldn't even imagine what it's like to not have a cell phone, right? Like we went for that. That juxtaposition from no cell phones, like nothing, you know, wireless internet, to literally anything in the blink of an eye at the touch of our fingertips. So it's this, there's quite a transition. That's crazy. But I think we're blessed to have experienced both of those worlds. Brandon Handley 1:47 Well, yeah, I love it. I love where we are, right, having had not had all this technology and stuff where we can just reach out to what we're doing right now to having it like, because we I would say we appreciate it that much more. Right? Brandon Novak 2:01 Absolutely. And you know, we have the ability to shut things off and slow things down, because we remember what it was like to not have these resources so readily available that the 1314 1618 year old kid today couldn't even fathom not living without. That's right. That's right. Well, Brandon Handley 2:24 let's uh, let's jump into it. Man, let's jump into like, I just kind of the addiction part, right, like jumping straight into there. Like, when did you kind of first get involved with any drugs? And when did you realize that you had a problem? Or when did it start taking over your life? Brandon Novak 2:48 I believe I was my story is my story. And we all have our own stories and our own journeys. And although the specifics may vary of each person's story, I think the endings remain the same. And my story is that my mother is not an addict or an alcoholic, my brother or sister who from our by a different man are not an addict or an alcoholic. But my father was an addict. His father was an addict. So I believed that I was genetically predisposed. I didn't really have much of a say so in the matter. And my story I don't think is much different than any others to be honest with you. I was groomed I was raised in the world of a fast life. My father never held a job a day in his life, he taught me one thing if and when I go to prison, how to conduct myself or the Hells Angels, he was a rather unsavory kind of fellow, he is no longer with us. He was diagnosed with a disease of addiction and and ran with it untreated for many years until, you know, I always talk to people when I say this, the issue will be addressed like the issue 100% will be addressed and either you choose to address the issue, you go to treatment, get your life back things that you have no idea that exists in life, or the issue addresses you and I get a phone call from your people saying thanks for trying to help him. But he didn't make it. And my father's issue was addressed, but not on his terms. And he's dead and he's no longer with us. But my mother was very successful. She was a nuclear physicist on the board of Mercy Hospital. My brother's an attorney in the White House practices, benefits. You know, so that's where I believe my, you know, I was groomed I was raised for that world. My father and his biker buddies would come to the house and grow a lot of herbs, smoke, a lot of drugs, sell a lot of drugs, fast play fast women. You know, I kind of absorb that coming up Brandon Handley 4:59 with Yeah, well, I mean, you're a product of your environment. Right? All right. It's really hard to escape that. Being a father and just seeing how much of an impact what I do rubs off on my children. It's like it's mind blowing just the small things that you don't think that their pickup they're picking up every detail all of it. And so, yeah, being being caught up in that and seeing that as you're growing up. That's that's pretty, pretty insane. Do you think? Like, you know, parlaying some of that nuclear physicist some of that success? Like was that like, your skateboarding success? Do you think? Like, Brandon Novak 5:38 Well, I think, you know, thank God for skateboarding, skateboarding raised me and skateboarding made me who I am today, all year in all areas of my life, including recovery? I have because I know then that I know now is that skateboarding weeds out the quitters? Or is that really the kind of guys that will, will go dry, try a trick. And if they don't make it, just say, I didn't really want it anyways. Right? Like, I will try a trick for for hours for days for weeks for months, occasionally years if need be until that one, you know, stroke of, of ingenious alignment, and everything makes sense. And I make the trek and that instant gratification. I'm on to the next. For sure. For sure. And that's where my recovery came from. You know, I refuse to accept failure, no is not an option. And so I was just I believe we all have these God given talents. You the best ping pong player in the world, but God might not see fit to put a paddle in your hand. I was blessed with the ability to have a skateboard, put my hand at the age of seven. And then that boards has my hand. I knew I was going to be a professional skateboarder. Alright, that's awesome. Brandon Handley 6:53 Yeah. That's awesome. I'm still trying to figure out how to get a kickflip to land Brandon. After all these years actually, my son wanted to pick up skateboard. And so we went out and got a board and we went out to the local park. So love that story. You're right, like your you'll never quit that. You know, trying to get that trick and then just keep going for it. And you never quit trying to get sober. Right? Like 13 tries. Brandon Novak 7:21 Yeah, right away many more tries, but 13 attempts at checking myself until facility. But I remember, like, during the era of filming, Viva la bam, right? Like we'd be filming all day. And after we were wrapped the cast and the crew would go to the bar in town and pour I'd go meet them at the pub, I would go to an AAA meeting. And I would end up meeting them at the bar to get fucking annihilated by the band was like, What is wrong with you, you go to these meetings and then you come get loaded with us. Like it makes no sense. But to me, it made a lot of sense because I knew that one day it was going to end one of two ways. Either I was gonna get sober, or I was gonna die in the process of trying. But I was never the kind of guy that that accepted the the outcome to be a forever thing of my addiction that I like, fuck that. Brandon Handley 8:17 What do you mean by that? Like, Brandon Novak 8:19 like, I never was the guy that was like, I'm gonna die with a needle in my arm I inactive addiction. Just leave me be this. All that I want. Brandon Handley 8:28 Yeah, yeah. You always see yourself getting beyond it or getting, that wasn't going to be your story. Brandon Novak 8:36 I didn't know what my story was going to be. I will my story was going to end one of two ways. Either I got sober or I died in the process of trying. Right? Brandon Handley 8:46 And, you know, your journey wasn't like you know, just kind of a backyard addiction. Like I mean, you are you breaking the houses stealing stuff getting caught. I was listening to a podcast earlier about like, people literally putting hits out on you. Right. It's been pretty crazy. What was like, share a story or two about the, you know, your addicted life. Something that gives a glimpse into the seediness of it. Brandon Novak 9:17 Yeah, well, my mother, you know, in the beginning of my alcoholism, she used to pray to god please God, don't let tonight be that night that I received that call that my son has sir came to his addiction and he's no longer with us. She used to pray not to get that call to the end of my addiction praying to God, please let tonight be the night that I find Steve that call just so I can know he's safe once and for all. You know that's kind of depravity in the depth that my addiction took me to my mother who is my number one supporter and would do anything for me the job was to die went from praying to please never receive a call that I had died to at the end. Praying to God pleased Let me get this call already, you know that that I think sums it up in itself man, like, that's the nature of my disease. The progression is fast. It's rapid. And it's very drastic. Brandon Handley 10:15 Would you say like, was that the end her misery or yours? Brandon Novak 10:19 Fuck both. Yeah, as in, you know, after, you know, 22 years of active addiction 13 inpatient treatment centers, lost count of our patients in detox, as my mother had already bought me a plot. People were taking life insurance policies out on me, okay, you have to be in a life support for seven days, at the same hospital on mother's a nuclear physicist at, she sold three homes to pay for two different treatment centers. I was kind of that guy that was deemed unhelpful and uncaring incapable of ever getting sober. Right. Right. So I'm sure both my misery and hers. Brandon Handley 10:54 Oh, no doubt, no doubt, you know, I was able to join you with your sober house and how to say hello to her for a quick moment. And she just mentioned that right now. She's just so happy that you're able to be around for the holidays, right? That you're actually a welcome guest for the holidays. And I thought that that was a pretty cool thing to hear. Brandon Novak 11:19 Give me one second my my iPad was about to charge and Ubers. Well, yeah, that's the end as the funny thing about sobriety is that like, and I tell all the guys that live in Novak's house, and anyone else does early in sobriety for that matter. Be careful what you ask for, cuz sometimes you just might get it. For sure. And now I'm a sober guy, and I'm Coming up on eight years, and that I have a lot of responsibilities. And a lot of people depend and rely on me and, and, and some of those people are my family members. So my mother, God bless her soul is my favorite person in this world. She probably calls me 10 times a day. Here, and, you know, that's, it's a blessing. And sometimes I can perceive it to be a curse. Or sir, but that's, that's all I ever wanted, in the beginning was like to just feel humanized and normalized again. Like a member of society, not an outcast, not a not, you know, not something or someone to be discarded because I had a, I had a deeper seated issue. Because before for a lot of years, when people saw me they would like cross the street, and that they didn't see me or walk the other way, rightfully so. Or if, because if you told me you love me, then I had you. If you told me, you love me, then I equated that to $10. So people had to love me from a distance. So now it's, it's it's really a beautiful thing to be part of my family's life. You know, I wasn't for a long time. And nothing to do with them. It was all me. Right? And I had even when I was around physically, mentally, I had been checked out for so many years. So, you know, it's it's nice, man. It's, I could go on for hours. But Brandon Handley 13:35 yeah, no doubt. Right. Well, let's, let's hop into the one part that I think is a little key to the Novak house and you doing what you're doing right now, let's just tell a quick story of the 13th check in, right, I guess we'll call it when you when you, you know, you go in pocket tripped out, you tell the story. Brandon Novak 13:57 Oh, well, you know, I may 25 2015, I found myself in a position where for the first time in my life, the pain had become so unbearable that I was willing to do anything in order to finally get myself out of the position I had created for myself, right. So all of a sudden I started becoming accountable for my actions, and realizing that my very best thing in place me here, and that I am the common denominator in my problems. And if I get the fuck out of my way, everything was i i And I can no longer deny the severity of my disease, the depravity that it takes me to and every attempt at every one of those 13 facilities prior to or 12 prior to they didn't tell me anything different than the other one missed out on, you know, like 13 was no different than 1211 10 98765432. The only difference was The pain had become so great that I was willing to finally become open minded just long enough to ask for help, and and more importantly, be able to follow through with the suggestions that people like yourself and others gave me and you know. So my thoughts are always ingrained in me and I'm very, I'm not the one people call for sympathy or a lighter, softer way. Because my sponsor always told me you never get between an alcoholic and their bottom. And I don't. And I will not, I believe there has to be repercussions from our actions. By the repercussions from my actions became great enough that again, I was willing to do anything that was suggested I went to that facility number 13. And, and literally, as a sponge absorbed anything that anyone told me to do, you know, I was tired, I was just hired, I was tired, I was bored. All these seeds had been planted unbeknownst to me it each one of those attempts at each facility and, and facility number 13. It's like the skies parted and I walked across the sea and everything just made sense from all previous attempts. You know, not to say things won't change. But to this point today, coming up on a year sober, my sobriety has been fairly simple. Because I've stuck to the basics, they told me the basics, you never have to go back to the basics. Yes, I've had heart aches, I've had deaths, I've had troubled times. But knowing where I came from, and the pain that I felt as a direct result of active addiction, like there's, to me, the allure and the illusion of a drink or a drug being a great time has wore off so fucking long ago. And I adhere to, to the suggestions that my mentors and my sponsors and, and the 12 steps and Alcoholics Anonymous have given to me, you know, and I can honestly say today right now, it is it is physically impossible for me to have a drink. Now, Brandon Handley 17:22 somebody put a drink in front of you just couldn't do it. Brandon Novak 17:24 Oh, it's impossible for me to even put up a ball of heroin in my hand right now. And my very first thought would be like, I need to flush this before my cats get to it. Because I've had that psychic change. Yeah, let's talk about that. Right? Like the definition of a spiritual experience is simply a psychic change. Meaning I've read no back today no longer think how I thought walking into treatment center number 13. Eight years almost. You're able to see things differently. Now. I'm a completely different man. I'm rewired. Yeah, and that but that's because you know I'm not people might listen to this and be like oh that egotistical Fuck no, I have a very very very healthy respect for my disease is I'm well armed with the facts I finally understand the opponent that I'm up against. And and most importantly, I suffer with a disease called alcoholism. Not alcohol wasn't meeting so well yesterday sobriety? Sure. Brandon Handley 18:27 I love that. I love that. Um, so you know, you go in to 13th Place your hot mess. You finally get flipped around. I think what's kind of funny about your story too. You didn't share it here but like I've listened to listen to it plenty of times so like where you go in and they tell you you gotta get a job even though you've got like money coming in right in one way or another. You've got to go you're bussing tables waiting tables here you are Brandon Novak guys got, you know, celebrity. He's got endorsements and all that all this good stick on for him. And you're in there bussing tables and waiting, waiting on tables to make your money. pay your own way out of your pocket. And this was the path that kind of opened up for you. And since you found a way that worked for you, you decided to find a way to share almost that exact same path with others sued Novak house right? Absolutely. Brandon Novak 19:23 You know, it's funny. Yeah, totally. But the funny thing is, is I didn't understand any of the any of the journey that I was on, I never realized along that journey that I was discovering these paths that were on lead to a much broader fucking scope or a grand scheme, you know, or big picture. I simply was just beaten so bad that I got out of my way follow suggestions of people that actually knew what they were talking about. And I always say this thing works when I don't work it right as long as I stay out of it mentally sure your suggestions fit physically, you know, if you continue to bring the body, the mind will follow. Right? If I found myself in a position where the pain was so great that I was just willing to do anything. It's physically it defies logic that I can use that very same brain that thought me into that terrible place to then think me out of it. If I could have done that I wouldn't be in a fucking 12 Step Program wouldn't have ended up in AAA, that's not my lifelong dream or goal, believe it or not. But so I'm a firm believer now because again, I was beaten so bad, I knew that my way no longer worked. I got out of my way, had some great mentors followed their suggestions. They said, Go, I said, Sure. They said, when I said what time, you know. And I just brought the body I brought the body, I brought the body and one day, the mind just followed Brandon Handley 20:51 some of that, would you? Was there ever, like a light clicking on for you a moment that like, I don't know, kind of like when you're first riding a bike, or like, oh, look, I'm doing it. Brandon Novak 21:00 Yeah, like put, but everything I've learned in my life is all in retrospect, my life is it forward and learn backwards. So the very first moment that that took place, when I was in my treatment center for my 90 days, and I had in 90 days, I had made it to my eight step, and not one step made any difference, or any more or less sense than the last one to two, two to three, three to four, four to five, five to six, six to 778. Nothing, I felt nothing, I had no clue what was going on. But I just again, follow suggestions, bringing the body mind will follow. Right. All of a sudden, I have my parole officer who promised to violate me if I lied to him, then as the truth and I lied again, because he just told me violate me while I'm in treatment, I knew things are different. And I, he asked for some evidence about this lie that I had presented. And, and it was impossible to gather evidence about this lie. And I call my sponsor, he said, Well, you've you've worked, you've experienced the third step, right? And I said, yeah, it was the first step for people that don't know, came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us turn our will and our life over to the care of God as we understand it. And, and I said, Yeah, and he goes, Well, here you go, God is everything or is nothing. And he said, Look at it this way. Let's say he does violate you. That means that you're simply meant to take the message inside the walls to someone who can't get out to hear from you directly. For some reason, I just believed him and I got on the phone I called and I let it was, it was on a Friday at like 3:30pm and I left a message on his voicemail admitting that I had lied. And that that was not true. What I told him I had to wait until Tuesday for him to call me back. I meant like 86 days sober, right by and usually would be racing. Sure, I'm going to get violated. I'm going back to prison. After I left that message, I went back down to my my room, and I fell asleep and I slept like a baby. It was a craziest thing ever. And it was right there that I accepted my fate. And, and in telling the truth there. It was like, one through eight hit me like a ton of bricks, like a blink of an eye. It all made sense. It was crazy. And I didn't get violated. School led me you know, like, he promised me that he violate me. And he was a guy that was very serious about that. Brandon Handley 23:34 I've yet to meet a parole officer that's not serious about their job. Brandon Novak 23:38 Well, my other ones, he was my probation officer Michelle ward. God bless her soul, Chester County. She was the one that like, saved my life. nearly enough when she should have violated me by every sense of the word. Unknown Speaker 23:52 Yeah. Brandon Novak 23:54 What happened there? I went in there and she was supposed to violate me. She was. She said, I don't know why I'm not going to violate you. But I'm going to give you one more chance and she sent me back to the rehab that actually works. She called and got them on the phone. Brandon Handley 24:10 Okay. Okay. That's crazy. So, you're taking you're taking this right. And, again, I'm not a stepper Brandon. And this is this. This program isn't about, you know, spiritual dopes kind of its own thing, but it follows. Oddly enough, the 12 step pattern, right, where you get to the 12 step and the 12 step is what for the people that don't know Brandon. Brandon Novak 24:39 Oh, fuck, you make me Brandon Handley 24:42 look there's another there's gonna be a test. Brandon Novak 24:45 He carries a message to addict or alcoholic who still suffers. Brandon Handley 24:48 Right, but you carry the message forward, right? Yeah, yeah. So that's what you're doing right with this with the Novak house. Let's talk about, you know, so let's talk about the Nova Cows, what it is that you're doing, how long it's been an action and what's going on there? Brandon Novak 25:04 Well, I so as I completed that 90 day treatment center, from there, I went to a sober living house, where I live for one year. And the reason why I went there because my sponsor at the time who had 11 years suggested that I go, because he did, and still stayed sober. Right. I wasn't trying to reinvent the wheel here, I knew that my way no longer works in my best thinking place me here, I was getting out of my way. Bringing the body just bringing the body mind has no idea but the body's showing up. And I found a suggestion. Oddly enough, I too, am Coming up on eight years. So like weird, not really. But while I was in that house, me and my best friend George, who is also still sober to this day, we had literally some of the best times of our life in this house. And I've had some amazing times in my life, and I've done really rad shit. I kidding you. I think my favorite Christmas ever was in that house. And we understood the importance and the effect that it had on us. And we always talked and we said that one day when we were in a position that we were financially capable, we were going to recreate that very same house. And also you people from the sober community kept telling me in order for me to keep what I have, I have to give it away. So five years into my journey and his Well, we decided we were going to replicate that Sober Living house. And we did we opened up our very first Novak's house in Wilmington, Delaware with 10 beds, and unfortunately, there was quite a need for those services. And I wish there wasn't in my houses didn't exist, but there are and they do and and we started with one house with 10 beds and today we have four houses with 40 beds. And I run around the nation like an insane maniac. Raising funds charitable donations to provide scholarships for any man seeking a sober living home. What I've found out that my why one of my why's today is I refuse to let funds be a deterrent as to why someone can't find a safe, adequate home to continue their journey and upon completion of a treatment center. Brandon Handley 27:38 I think that's awesome. Right? I think when you give your speech you're taking like at your event you took the this is the place where the misfits fit in right you're taking the people and Brandon Novak 27:53 we take the bottom of the barrel right like our place is not the place that like you come because you want just a weekend getaway now there are beautiful homes, they're amazing, but they're the people that have burned the resources and and kind of the discard it, you know, as I once was for sure. Brandon Handley 28:15 What was it? You know about that house? Can you can you pinpoint anything about that place that you guys wanted to replicate? Just the process? Brandon Novak 28:25 It was the process did you know right that there's a million treatment centers out there there's a million sober houses out there. I'm a firm believer the perfect treatment center or the perfect sober house that you guys sober it is the perfect treatment center is the one that you got sober in, right whichever one that is. I know that what we are intent on doing is creating an environment and to to make it a home not a house and we pride and attention into the homes that we create. Because we want the individuals that reside in them to take pride in their home and where they reside a little bit more than they might find a drink or a drug appealing kind of hoping that the ends justify the means Brandon Handley 29:15 for sure. I was talking who's your carpenter um if you want give him a shout out we Yeah, Brandon Novak 29:21 well we have where I was. Brandon Handley 29:23 So here's the dread hair guy that I met there he did yeah Brandon Novak 29:31 he's the painter Brandon Handley 29:32 is so so so he said you know and i Your sober house is the only one I've ever stopped and right. He said though that your houses are like no. So nice. Yeah, compared to some other places. Do you think that that gives these guys like kind of a feeling of hope as well being like, wow, I can have something like this for my life if I just keep my shit together. Brandon Novak 29:56 That's our hopes. Right? Like there's a lot of different little layers to it. But that's one of them. And it absolutely is it you know that paired with accountability paired with structure? Paired with cleanliness, like it all plays a part. Sure. Kind of like a, you know, one strand isn't more or less important than the other. Brandon Handley 30:18 That's right. That's right. The and one of the things I think we talked in brief at your event, but you'd mentioned like that there is structure, but it's not overly structured. So that gives them enough freedom and space to, I think, be themselves and do what they've got to do without feeling like they're on lockdown. Brandon Novak 30:37 Yeah, because they're not and my house is, aren't that they're not one of which, where, you know, you lose your freedom. Quite the contrary, actually. But the good thing is we do a really good process with assessments. And by beings so blessed with that. We don't run into people coming there and getting high smoke so much as we run into people coming there and don't want to follow all the rules. So we really let people know. Like, if you're not serious about staying sober, this isn't the house for you. You can't get lost in it. There's cheaper houses you can go with with less rules, right? Like, we'll give you an address. So it's Brandon Handley 31:21 a no, has anybody ever take you up on that? Brandon? Does anybody be like, You know what, thanks for that. And they roll down the street? Brandon Novak 31:27 Maybe they won't tell us? You know what I mean? Do maybe they don't? Everyone's process is their process, and we're all entitled to our process. If somebody would have robbed me of my process along my way, I wouldn't be here today. So like, I'm a big fan of that. Brandon Handley 31:45 Do you ever this crosses my mind, given everything that I've consumed to put in my body over the years, which is, I'm gonna guess less than you. But you know, I'll be like, I got to a point where, like, you know, what, I put so much shit in my bio does so many things that, like, if I'm still alive, right now, there's gotta be a reason for and like, leaning into that, right? Like, and just being like, discover the purpose. Like, like, I get down to your place and, and do the breath work with the guys that feel like that's a piece of something I'm able to do. Does that ever occur to you? Or are you just driving with the headlights? Oh, Brandon Novak 32:23 no. Yeah, I I mean, in the first couple years. I'm not religious, but I'm very spiritual. And I didn't really think much about it. The first couple years of my sobriety, I just continued to bring the body or the body. And then around two and a half years, it totally transitioned to, to completely spiritual and everything is, is of a much bigger, broader plan that I'm clearly a grain of sand in. And I play no part of. So it's like, I'm, I don't I don't I don't take credit for any of this. None of this is by my doing. I'm simply just playing the part that I was assigned today. And now everything is spiritual, you know, like everything, maybe too much. So sometimes, I just kind of give up to the unit. Brandon Handley 33:26 Well, yeah, so tell me a little bit about that. I love that right? Obviously so spiritual dope came from you know, just recognizing like this connection with source and like having that high from like, whatever you call that right connection to God source universe. What's that story look like for you? Now? I hear you talk a lot about synchronicities. I think there was a I caught like a man I caught like an Instagram review tote and some crystals around. You know, what's that look like? You know, you've got this work that you're doing right now, I'm sure that that's part of your spirituality. But what does your own spiritual practice look like? Well, you Brandon Novak 34:03 know, I, every day I start my day on my knees, and every day I end my day on my knees, and I know that without a constant contact and have a very healthy connection with my higher power, none of this is possible. None of this and I never get that confused or think that I, I created this. I'm very big with that. I just try to remain as useful as I can to my God's children, which are my brothers and sisters. And you know, the more I do for others, the better my life is. Brandon Handley 34:44 Do you feel like the more that you're able to do for others, the more that kind of flows through you? Brandon Novak 34:50 Well, with what flows Brandon Handley 34:52 like, you know, just like I would say, You know what, I'm here what I feel like you're saying is like you're an instrument of God, right and like divine source flows. through you and you're able to, you know, connect with others. I don't really think Brandon Novak 35:05 of it like that. I don't think what flows through me. I just think like, uh, you know, because again, I am too smart for my own fucking good. Now I'll, I'll twist this narrative to make me think that I've done this. So I sure I tried out the, you know, I just, I just kind of tricky slope, right? Yeah, I just kind of it works when I don't work it. You know, it's crazy. But I don't think much about a lot of the stuff that I do. Just because I'm so busy with so many projects that I don't really have time to sit back and connect the dots of like, Oh, I did this for this person. And this person achieved this. And now they're here with them. And the fact you know, I don't even I just get so caught up in the day to day. Yeah, this is probably for the best, Brandon Handley 35:53 sir, sir. So he's just staying out of your own way. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah. Brandon Novak 36:00 That's what I've learned is, the longer I stay sober, the less that I know, because I see how amazing my spirituality is, and how powerful it is. So like, I've never be so arrogant. Personally, this is just me, I would never be so arrogant to think that I understand what my God's will is. That's, that's completely insane. Because it's so fucking big and vast. And, Brandon Handley 36:25 but no, I'm with you. Right. Like, if I think I know what to do, and I can do it all by myself. And your point, like I wouldn't be in this situation I'm in now. Right? Oh, one of the things that I was actually touched by, and it was a bit of a challenge, and I'm curious to hear how you deal with it. You're one of your residents. He was probably one of the first guys I connected with coming down to the Novak house. Tim Wright recently passed, and you know, his passing impacted me in a way that most don't, you know, it's all over on TV, and I haven't been close to somebody pass on for for quite some time. How does that impact you? Like, what do you you know, Brandon Novak 37:11 I wish I could say it impact me more, but I've kind of become numb to it. Brandon Handley 37:17 Well, I mean, you know, is that because it's you're surrounded by and you're only doing what you can do you No, no, let go and let God type of thing or, Brandon Novak 37:28 well, I believe that everyone has a message to carry, right, I believe maybe the I believe, I believe my God is everything I don't believe God is, is what I think he should or shouldn't be. I believe God is everything. And I might get scolded for this. But I believe God is heroin, I believe God is crack, I believe God fucking out of all because without those substances, it would not have brought me to the child of God that I am today. But that's just me not imposing my will on anything or anyone else. But I believe that, unfortunately, some have to die for others to live. Brandon Handley 38:09 I get it right. That's the example. And you've got a bunch of people that are close to that. And they see what can happen if they think that they can go back Brandon Novak 38:19 and it didn't need it doesn't have to be that way. Brandon Handley 38:24 But yeah, so what if I'm in the Novak house, what are some of the things I got to do? What's some of the structure Brandon Novak 38:34 so you have to have a job, you have to have a sponsor, you have to be working the steps you have to go to five meetings a week you have to make curfews, you have to pass random your analysis you have to go continue and successfully
From Addiction to Advocacy: Darren Prince's Inspiring Journey to Recovery
28-02-2023
From Addiction to Advocacy: Darren Prince's Inspiring Journey to Recovery
Darren Prince, International Best Selling author of his memoir Aiming High, is a prominent sports and celebrity agent and global advocate for addiction/mental health recovery. Through his agency, Prince Marketing Group, he represents icons Magic Johnson, Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair, Jerry West, Dominique Wilkins, Chevy Chase, Charlie Sheen, Denise Richards, Carmen Electra, and many others as well as having worked with the late Smokin’ Joe Frazier, Muhammad Ali and Evel Knievel. As a leading authority in this space, Prince’s insights have been featured in WSJ, NYT, USA Today, CNN, Fox and Friends, Chris Cuomo, Tucker Carlson, “On Purpose” podcast with Jay Shetty, Extra TV, Dr. OZ and many other top media outlets. Darren has experienced what life is like in the celebrity world but also seen the dark reality of addiction through his own personal struggle with opiates. With over 14 years of sobriety, it’s now Darren’s mission to help others avoid and break free from addiction and mental health struggles. He had a God awakening on July 2, 2008, and believes in a spiritual higher power and that anyone can turn their bottom into a new beginning. Connect with Darren here: https://officialdarrenprince.com/ Summary Introduction to today’s episode. 0:42 How did you end up with addictions? 1:36 The turning point in his life. 6:39 It's better now than it was then. 12:24 Where's the drugs when the drugs wear off? 16:32 The miracle of calling out to god. 21:03 The power of choice. 25:09 Finding your purpose in life. 29:05 The importance of taking care of your health. 35:44 Getting a call from the White House. 39:01 Darren's message 45:22 Intro Guy 0:00 Your journey has been an interesting one up to hear you've questioned so much more than those around you. You've even questioned yourself as to how you could have grown into these thoughts. Am I crazy? When did I begin to think differently? Why do people in general appear so limited in this thought process? Rest assured, you are not alone. The world is slowly waking up to what you already know inside yet can't quite verbalize. Welcome to the spiritual dough podcast, the show that answers the question you never even knew to ask. But you the answers to questions about you this world the people in it most importantly, how do I proceed now moving forward? We don't even have all the answers but we sure do love living in the Question Time for another decade of spiritual dub with your host Brandon Handley. Let's get right into today's episode. Brandon Handley 0:42 One Hey there Spiritual Dope I'm on here today with Darren prince. He is an international best selling author of his best of his memoir. Aiming High is a prominent sports and celebrity agent and global advocate for Addiction and Mental Health Recovery. There was agency Prints marketing group who represents icons Magic Johnson, Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair, Jerry, West, Dominique Wilkins, Chevy Chase, all these guys are greats. Right? And, you know, I didn't meet him getting autographs or anything like that. Darren, I met recently at an event with Brandon Novak and Novak house. And I think that's somebody that you're fairly close with, through addiction and recovery. So I said, You know what, I don't want to miss this opportunity to chat with somebody and share your story about all that you're doing. It's so great out there in the space. So Darren, Thanks for Thanks for coming on today. Darren Prince 1:36 Thanks for having me. Brandon Handley 1:38 Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean, let's let's just kind of dive right into it. You know, you You're, you're well known you've done. You've worked with all these greats. But you've started like, with an addiction at a pretty young age, right? You started with an addiction at a pretty young age, and it caused a lot of havoc in your life. And now you've kind of translated that and transmute it into something good let's start at the beginning man like how did you end up with with some addictions Darren Prince 2:09 I you know, I grew up you would have thought just a normal childhood which I'd say for the most part i i had great loving mother and father and sister but I was always verbally to use for things so called Special Ed and small classrooms and back then, which probably more add whatever I was interested in, I gravitated to them most of the stuff I didn't. And I think just that did a number of my psyche and my self confidence, my self esteem. So at 14 When I was in sleepaway camp, and I had terrible stomach pains one night, the nurse gave me the scream liquid and having no idea what it was for the pain I took it and walking back to the bunk within a minute I felt like Superman like all those feelings of inadequacies and low self worth and self esteem. I knew I felt just as good as everybody else just as popular just as smart and went to bed then I think nothing of it. But I did all the activities that camp that next day, and I remember just lying in the bunk bed next night obsessing on that feeling and I wanted more of and I did that for a couple of weeks until mom and dad came up with visitation day and found that I was taking liquid Demerol. Yeah, I don't know what is Demerol and emeralds in OBS general problem most likely something that gives you a hospital like more but heavier opiate and back then the opiate epidemic wasn't anywhere near but you know, it was today. And you know, I had a way about me to assist innocent kid that was just in a lot of pain. And you know, she was probably just trying to come a relief every night or I was getting his bed stomach cramps and just, you know, played it to the hill just like I did when I had my wisdom teeth removed a few months later and my mom gave me these white pills that were called extra sent by cannons and that same feeling came back and you know, when I saw the bottle had two pills left I put on the crocodile tears fry it and said I've got to go back to the dentist have a bad infection. I know it's something's wrong and you know, panicked as a loving mother took me back and gave her another dozen bills, whatever it was. Brandon Handley 4:15 Yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy to us and it's such a young age. Right. And those are like those are some that was your thing, right? Like kind of like Demerol and opiates and Darren Prince 4:27 cocaine, ecstasy, you name it. Sure. And I he became an age and opiates were the ones that taught me up and it took me straight to the bottom. Brandon Handley 4:37 Sure, sure. Let's let's walk our way into the agents. Phase two. Right. So here you are. Age 14, you're kind of you're already like, you know, a script chaser. Right. But you've also got some cool things going on. You may mention that you're you were in like these quote unquote special ed classes. You know, you need a little bit extra attention to get through teaching you how to chip on your shoulder. But that actually led you on to something kind of cool. Right? Talk a little bit about that. Darren Prince 5:06 Yeah. So I started a mail order baseball card company long before the internet boom, and became nationally recognized, doing trade shows all over the country. First person, I think in the state of New Jersey, I have a cell phone, it was called Bell Atlantic, it was in a big leather carrying case with a battery pack, the phone cost me about $3,500. That's how tough we were to get about $3 a minute to use the phone. And the dumb idiot that wasn't going to go anywhere in between class was going into his locker room dealing with stockbrokers and a bunch of guys from ESPN. Were buying from me some of the big commentators that were big collectors and I would just broker deals of it. I had an incredible network database of dealers around the country, I was advertising because trade shows I would go to the best convention to get the best location. So I was spending 1000s a week on advertising myself, I became a very well known figure in the baseball card hobby and the boom of the 80s. So for any collectors that are listening now, it actually started in the 80s, which is why there's an industry there is today and by Tom, I'm 16 years old man, I'm probably making a quarter of $1,300,000 Ask us globally mean anything to me, you know, I came home from school. And it was about, you know, the hustle of laying out my ads for the next week and filling orders and hiring. You know, some of the so called friends that were were calling me, idiot and dumb. They were now calling me boss at 16 and 17 years old. And you know, and then from there, eventually I sold that company in 19. I dropped out of college, my freshman year of Bridgeport and went full steam ahead into the memorabilia business. So it's booking autograph signings from Muhammad Ali magic chevy chase to Frazier. Pamela Anderson. And by the time I was 24, built, built that business had some legal issues. And it was kind of at this turning point in my life where first time I ever had some financial difficulties and magics dip on my side and said, Hey, I know about making mistakes he had he was coming up with his HIV announcement, the anniversary of that was November 7 on Monday. And what do you want to do now? And because of my dad giving me the inspiration of explaining that to you know, like, not what you know, we work with the most iconic people in the world. You know, go speak to magic, you supported you and first client for my agency. Brandon Handley 7:33 That's pretty that's pretty awesome. I love that. Well, give me a moment here. Like how did we translate from, you know, in first of all, like, I'll just in my mind, I'm thinking like, mail order catalog. I thought you were just I thought you were just going in and setting up setting up the tables doing the shows you were. Darren Prince 7:51 Yeah, but we had a big Yeah, I have people taking orders. We're going on clothing and buy the stuff on the weekend, sell it during the week and knew exactly what I needed to find on a weekend to follow orders, mark it up and make a profit and get it out next week. Brandon Handley 8:05 That's awesome. And you were making what you're making? This is a what is the 80s? Is that right? Like mid 86. So I mean, I'm just gonna I told my son right now he's 10. And he's already feels like he's done with school. And I told him like, you know, when he makes his first million, feel free to drop out, right? Like, you know, go ahead. So, so you go from you go from this card business bit, and it's working out really well for you, you sell it how do you make the translation over into, you know, signatures like what? Darren Prince 8:34 What happened, and it's funny because one of my agents here Matilda was telling her the story older I think the sexiness and the coolness of being around like some of the biggest stars that were doing these autograph signings at conventions, it drew me to it. And, you know, again, that insecurity brokenness, like no cards are cool and making money but the cards, and I kind of just more or less went into the autograph signing thing, because I was like, wow, I've an opportunity to book my first autograph signing with Muhammad Ali, the most recognized human being on Earth. And, you know, for somebody with low self esteem and you know, was always high and to be around that environment. It was just unbelievable. And then I just think my appetite grew. From there it was same sort of thing. Well, autograph signings are kind of cool and hanging out with them but I won't be this autograph fucker for shinies I want to do big things. I want to do endorsements commercials, you know, when that's how that evolved. Brandon Handley 9:28 You wanted to level up and this whole time you know, you're you're you're popping pills, right? You're you're doing whatever. Darren Prince 9:35 You're on the autograph signing era, which the company was called prints of cards. That was the same name as the the big card company. You always partying whatever it was you name it, I did it. But when I became an agent, I learned real fast with magic when a morality clauses when the lawyers put together an agreement I was like, Alright, I gotta play this straight. Sciatica had anxiety and hey, like any good drug out If you junkie, I played it to the hell, you know how easy it was to get any script that I needed when I'd get them on the phone with Joe Frazier or bring him a Magic Johnson signed jersey or go like this guy's got it all together and a lot of pain, go get an MRI, go get an x ray, let's see how we can fix you. Let's do medication management. And for the first five, six years, man of my ancient life, you know, it worked really did. I became a rock star with networking. But I also say like this, like what was once living to us turned out to using to live. Yeah, and I just don't know when it turned. And I do remember that night I lost my superpower. So I remember when the oxycottons didn't work at an example, Joe Frazier in Dallas, Texas, and probably for a good six or seven years. I was trying to chase that high after that. Yeah. Brandon Handley 10:52 And you talk a little bit about this insecurity and brokenness, right. Like where do you feel like that stemmed from a little bit that was encouraging. Darren Prince 11:00 Like, I can't blame my mom and dad for it. And my mom and I came from a family with a lot of love. You know, my dad had tough love bugs. That was my biggest supporter. My mom gave me way too much. I think some people could understand that because that cause anxiety, it'll leave the house and I'll be around them all the time. And you know, those two were on there's too much and she was she overwhelming. With love were a kind of, you know, like I said, causing excess amount of anxiety with the over coddling knowing that I was special ed and need special attention. And I think it just can be very uncomfortable and how to deal with life. If I was in, you know, attached to her at home with her and my dad, and we get homesick a lot if I'd sleep over at friend's houses or birthday parties or weekend getaways. I remember it just a horrible feeling in my stomach just not being comfortable being away from mom and dad. And you know, you take all that into the real world with the verbal teasing and you don't speak up about those words a dumb an idiot I think using the word that begins with our from mentally challenged, I heard all these things. And when you absorb that, and those developmental years, guess what, you start believing it especially now put it out. And I didn't have the courage to speak up. Brandon Handley 12:14 Yeah, and the 80s You know, I grew up in a suit. Like they weren't kind. They were not. They like yeah, now I think so it's, you know, gratefully for my children a lot. It's better, right as different than than what it was then. But there was there was very few teachers really stopping that from happening to right. Oh, hell, it could be the teachers. Darren Prince 12:37 Back then, like I had a teacher. I won't mention her name, which she's not even alive anymore. US history. 60 kids in the class. I remember like yesterday, and you know, it's a level of psychological trauma, nothing that you know, it's something I've been healed from but you remember it. And she bought the first 90% of the class their test. And I'm in the bath with for six kids. My friend John Angelo gave squirrel joy. I'll never forget my crew, Carmen. And we called ourselves the our only group. People can figure out what word I mean. joking around about it. But again, I'm actually taking this in Stoke, right? Handed everybody else their tests. She's shouts in front of the entire class, I'll get to you guys in the back row with your test in a minute. Let me just take care of everybody else first. And even the tone was speaking to us in a way that we're less than we're not as smart or not as good. And you remember that? Yeah. Here we are. 40 something hours later, and I'll never forget it. Brandon Handley 13:43 For sure. So when you're when you're, you know, drugging when your pill pop and when you're drinking. You're trying to forget that piece of who you are. Darren Prince 13:54 I'm trying to forget that piece of who you are. But I'm also there's a great revelation on Jay Shetty. He's a dear friend of mine. I was at his place on Sunday that I made it to the top. But I'm looking backwards at all the people that said I wasn't going to make it. Usually when you get to the top or somebody to fake top there's a lot of smoke and mirrors still it I didn't feel worthy of being at the top of the industry around the biggest stars in the world. And so my thing was always look backwards. Look at me look at the dumb ugly one to one no doubt that I'm Swanee one that wasn't going to make it look, I mean, I look at it, you know, and it was that way when I was 16. I remember when I would just go to bed at night laughing because my dad was like, you're making more money than most of your friends fathers that are that are lawyers that have real crown like the bed like, you know, celebrating this and Brandon Handley 14:53 what kid wouldn't right at that age for sure. That makes sense. Darren Prince 14:57 And that was all that deep rooted. insecurity that that verbal teasing and just that feeling of less than and, you know, my mom thought it was funny sometimes when she would hear me on the phone like buy and sell this person backwards and forwards and she thought it was hilarious, but it came from a deep place of insecurity and resentment. And I was like, How funny is that this guy is going to go to college mom for the next four years paying off loans for the next 10 years when he gets out, and already have more millions put away and she'd be like, I'm so proud. It wasn't like a corrective thing. I was just, you know, so I think all of that though, when I looked back, it was just such a deep level of brokenness and inadequacy that I just always had approved. And then now here I am at the top of the industry with magic and you know, Ali and Frazier and you know, Pam, Pamela Anderson and Chevy Chase and smokin Joe Frazier. So it's a recipe for disaster, man, you know, and the luck started coming. And I started developing and working out and the girls start comping left and right. I'm just frickin doing whatever the heck I gotta frickin do to uphold this image that my entire class is like, holy shit. Darren prince made it bigger than every single one of us is this world famous agent that's on the sideline of the Superbowl and, you know, backstage passes and walk in the red carpet at the MTV VMAs and all these big award shows, and I just ate it all up. I thought that's what what my calling was meant to be. And, you know, I need I needed a lot of driving force. I needed the expensive sports cars to be driving an Acura NSX, souped up at 21 years old that cost me $200,000 First person to buy a house and you know, the jewelry and the diamond Rolex is and now I look now and this is me. I could go on buy a new Rolex tomorrow. It's not what makes me happy. Brandon Handley 17:00 Sure. For sure. Sure. Well, let's get there. Right, like so where where's the drugs wear off? Right? You realize you'd lost your superpowers on one night, right? You go to pop the oxys and they're not doing what you need them to be doing? What happens then you panic. I mean, what where's it all got panicked. Darren Prince 17:21 I went down to this corporate event in the conference room this ballroom and I couldn't figure out for the life of me what was going on. And the next day the same thing happened and I'm in Florida by myself two days later, and I found a different way to ingest it. That gave me a little bit of a buds I started snorting my oxys my Percocet and my bike and it's, you know, I kind of mostly live that way. For another four or five years had an overdose and Las Vegas came back after that overdose finally in New Jersey, and called an addiction psychiatrist told me I was an opiate addict put me on Suboxone, but never go to a therapist and lie to him like I did because he didn't hit a nail. I was taking Xanax and Valium and mood stabilizers and antidepressants and anxiety. Every anxiety pill that I can get my hands on and snorting Ambien the frog went to bed at night and still drinking a couple of days a week and Mike Mike died awakening came on July 1 As you heard that I yeah, my Uncle Steve made the rest in peace in his own girlfriend Andrea. I was just sick and tired of being sick and tired at the jumping off point. My ego was too big. I'm too important to go to rehab I can't lock myself up for 30 days and she just came into my condo at the time I never met her and it was a godsend. She's like, I've never met you but are you okay? And I told her I told her everything I never had such an honest conversation but the human in my life and I just felt drawn to her. And she looked at me and said devalue an advocate below so manage by see that she could be related to you are powerless and said yes. And she because all this started looking at all the photos on the walls with all the celebrities and awards and different things that I've gotten because none of this means anything because you don't mean anything to yourself. Do you realize that the disease of addiction does not discriminate it doesn't matter for from Park Avenue or park bench or if you've gone to Yale or jail and that broke my soul. And here I am the so called Big Time super agent broke down and cried and she goes it's okay on each because I just celebrated five years sober last week. pulls out a five year coin at her pocket. And she goes Do you want to get sober he wanted to anything that takes us at anything she because you have to put this before everything in your life and occur what it is if you lose the business, you don't want to lose your life but you can do this and I can show you the SOP period so right and was beautiful life. And yeah, she put me on a 36 hour detox plan and that next night was seven o'clock on a Sunday night July 2 I came back from the gym I was living at the Caroline building. I was married man and I came back from the gym. It's my third workout at the gym clinic do everything I can to get the dopamine going and the endorphins and came up I called them I said I can't frickin do this. I'm going to call the doctor I gotta get whatever we got to get my ankle struck Yellin on the other end and said, It's the goddamn disease talking of time, kick the crap out of it. You've been doing this since you were 14 years old. He was in recovery as well. He was back in recovery. He struggled for years until he passed and I said I can't frickin do this because you have to get yourself to a damn meeting, put your hands up and tell these people who are sick and suffering you need help and I hung up the phone ran in the bathroom, I shut the door I'm going from medicine cab and looking for Klonopin or some other non narcotic anxiety meds, take the craving away and out came to Vikings. I don't want to pull bottles, which was just shocking because Simona and on my axe, we spent hours going through other medicine cabinets two days before mine 36 hours before when Andrea said you got to get them all out of the house. You know, I'm weaning them off Suboxone. And I thought it was the gap that that is exactly what I need a man that bloods that God moment in that split second just when I needed. And the miracle happened because I thought on my knees for the first time in my life. I never called up to God like this before. And I've never done it since I pray every single night to him now. And I said God, take the money, take the notoriety of the business, I don't care, I need a single day of freedom to feel like little Darren when I was a young kid again, I'll do whatever it takes. If you take me out of hell. I will spend one day at a time the rest of my life using my platform take another jet with the exact words that I said. And it was like a lightning bolt. Because their shoulder was literally felt like somebody had a blowtorch on it. And I heard in this year as a voice. Say I'd got you and you're ready. And I stood up. And this hand opens and I flushed the opiates left in the living room on to computer there's no Uber back then. And I searched 12 step meetings near me and I found a church. So little ways away in the upper 80s Because it was late at night on Sunday had had an 8pm meeting and jumped right in a taxi cab and I looked up on this gorgeous summer, July 2 2008. I said to myself, Oh my God, for the first time of my life, I wanted to stay sober. More than 100 Get Hired What the heck just happened and I walked into a church basement 150 to 200 addicts, alcoholics that were at once to a hopeless state of mind and later send anybody new coming back sick and suffering or struggling and Sam went right up. And I know, he lifted it. And I came playing in front of a roomful of strangers. And it just came out. I said, I'm sick, I'm suffering. I'm suicide. Amazing life. And I didn't know why I'm doing this myself. But I need you guys help. And, you know, in that moment, I had to get to desperation. And I was crying out to get the power of choice back in my life and these people but it doesn't spiritual brothers and sisters, right after I said that, which was so key, came over to me and started kind of talking to me intimately in a soft tone voice not to disrupt the meeting. And they said, You're in the right place. We've been where you've been. Keep coming. You know, if you aren't what we have, do what we do. Take the car out of yours, put it in her mouth. We will love you before you ever learn how to love yourself. And then the one that was just magical, they said, keep coming to AAA. And don't worry about if you get it, because if you keep showing up. It's gonna get you nice. And that was that I felt in that room during that hour man. A connection that I never felt in my life. Ever Brandon, it was just I've heard things like I do that. Oh my God, that's my oh my god. And it was like, it was like just to add a body experience where no therapist, no drug. I literally felt it was almost like the dark side of me clearing out of my body. Yeah, immersed and obsessed with me and nothing can be for my in person meetings. I did the 99 date. I eventually got my sponsor Steve Delaval who just celebrated 35 years. You know, and once I hit that, probably six month mark because, you know, you're doing pretty good. He goes, I just got to tell you. You want to keep this gift, right? I said yeah, he goes over doing stuff. We're gonna wrap up the steps probably by the end of the first year. I'm not rushing, you throw it because your drug addiction wants to rush, your substitute, Rush. But once we get there, you want to keep this gift that I'm giving you. You better be prepared to give it away. I'd others. And once I started doing that, after that one year more hope and recovery began to heal on the Cleon. Brandon Handley 25:09 I love this and like, I think that, you know, if I looked at this through, you know, part parts of this to just general spirituality, you that part where you, you flushed down the pills, right? You opened yourself up to receive, you know, the higher power, right? You let it come and through and through you, you surrendered, like, you're like I can't do like, I'm not doing this life anymore. And you recognize this like power of choice, I love that you bring up the power of choice, you realize that? Maybe you that had been taken away from you for a moment, were because of your addiction. Right? So being able to say like, I want that back in my life. Yeah. Tell me a little bit about your what? You know, for somebody that's not familiar with step work. Tell me Tell tell the group a little bit about it. Because I think that one part of it, and I'm not a stepper there. And so I just happen to be familiar with the space. And I've gone through the steps without doing the steps, right. So it's really cool to see, like, oh, wow, what I did is in alignment with this thing. So tell the audience a little bit about it. If they're not familiar, Darren Prince 26:30 you have the 12 steps. I actually emailed my girlfriend, Nicolette them a couple of weeks ago. She's young and like anyone at any age, really, but especially young is working on our own clearing and healing and stuff. And my whole point to her was everybody can use these every single day. Yeah, alcohol is only mentioned in the first step for a reason to reason over 212 Step organizations around the globe with an adapted from a built up even talked about created on June 10, in 1935. You know, it's about meeting a powerless, that life has become unmanageable, whatever error that might be. It's about kind of coming to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore you to sanity. It's about taking your own personal inventory. It's about making amends to the people that you've harmed along the way. But also in a way that you don't farm them or others, it's about continuously taking your personal inventory. And when you're wrong, promptly admitted, no matter what area of recovery, you might be in or healing. You have to be vigilant every single day. And then, you know, it's about maintaining that constant contact and whatever that area of recovery or healing that you've attained and achieved giving it somebody else. Yeah. That is the magic. That's what has given me the self esteem. Yeah, that adult due respect I love them to death their dear family friends at this point, magical Ric Flair. Charlie Sheen, Chevy Chase criminal electorate, that young, beautiful people, they never gave it to me. I got it from my spiritual brothers and sisters. And I get it every time I give this away to somebody because I have a God given gift. And I've kept my word. Anybody that works with me sees it. There's not a single day that goes by I still might not get to in person meetings as much as I used to. I'm doing that more I'm still doing zoom meetings, but there's not a single day that I'm not doing something connect with somebody in recovery. You know, I'm on the board of Banyan treatment centers I do whatever I can to scholarship people there. I've gotten people to oaks recover. I've gotten people to know facts house using funds that I've raised from my aiming high foundation, but the greatest thing in the world because I'm not just giving them an opportunity to get a new life I'm helping every single human in their life. The benefit of this person getting their life back. And it's the greatest feeling in the world. I could lose all the money tomorrow and lose the business tomorrow. We don't live in this beautiful place in Brentwood, but I found me found me and the heartbreaking part about all that I've ever lost like I said, it's everybody that's so near and dear to me that I do what I can to take care of and make their lives better financially. I might not have that but Darren Prince could have be all good. I mean, you're gonna speak and at the same Darren friends that was paying found his purpose. Right Brandon Handley 29:33 now. I love that and kind of what you're talking about. There's your, your scene like that image where, you know, one one match strikes and lights and other right. That's what you're doing is helping others to light themselves up and see kind of the truth of who they are the power, the connection that they've got. Darren Prince 29:53 But that when that just one gets finished. I've had so many that have been just mine Long when I see the lights come on in somebody's eyes. Yeah. Brandon Handley 30:08 I mean, that's, that's me. That's when you realize kind of what your purpose is right? Darren Prince 30:11 Obviously with my dear friend Jen Cohen last night just a huge podcast habits and hustle one of the top 10 Business podcasts in the world. There's Mark Cuban, I just know, helped her out. She got him and she said Gary Vee and Eric Thomas and she did a podcast that was out in the Middle East. These guys reached out to Scott Bo Hopkins, for me and her oddly, we had no idea I went to first she went the second I had the entire crew, including the whole, in tears multiple times to the interview, because he had something similar not to drugs in the alcohol, but he understood the brokenness, he understood the looking back, Spencer, the host, and she goes, You have no idea when I got there. I was like, why am I here? While they're talking about is Darren's don't like he had every single one of us in tears. Like, he took us to a different level of accountability and recognizing either flaws or what we've been through, because I think that's what God wants, wants me to do. You know, I'm not afraid to tell people at all mistakes I've made and continue to make, and my character flaws and my character defects because it's a free feeling. Yeah, liberation for 99% of this world. I think it's smoke and mirrors, and everybody's got something out there trying to cover up. You know, me my background Brandon Handley 31:33 right here. I'm trying to cover up my background right now. Darren Prince 31:39 I'm like, Man, I don't know if you put on a little bit of weight to try to buy, just to just to be able to have that for the first time of my life and this type of being made and said, I stomach. I'm not perfect, better quality mistakes lashed out. And this mouth can get me in trouble or texting or emailing. But I'm way better than I've ever been. I tell people try to say what you mean mean what you say don't say we try to scam people, instead of you being understood. I think in the heat of an argument for anybody listening, and you're about to open up your big fat mouth. Don't engage. And it's better to feel alright. And right. If you're 100%, right. The strength is keeping your mouth shut. Don't send that text don't send that email. Because in five or 10 minutes, whatever you're about to explode about forgotten like that. And that's how you build your spiritual relevancy built discipline that to yell at change of character defects to staying in alignment to manifest to your higher self. And I've gotten so good at that again, not perfect. Yeah. But filthy her will hurt me with my mom a handful of times. It's not easy. Sure. My girlfriend, I'll tell you but I am so much better than I've ever been. I'm aware of it. I'm vigilant. I have to weigh out. Take a deep breath. Which is why I'm looking forward to working with you. Be fun battered i Yeah, it could be Brett. Is this worth it was also in recovery. We say we're not doormats. Occasionally. My sponsor stabbed a laptop, my it things have to come out a certain way. Get out. But y'all know if you're right and wrong when you're in recovery. If you have that emotional hangover, there has been times I've had to put people in their place. I'll hang up the phone, go on with my day, not even think twice about it. Sure. Oh, my gosh, I know that it was something that had to be done. So people can understand the way I expect things to be done. Brandon Handley 33:43 For sure. Right. Yeah. I mean, I like that. Not being a doormat part, I think, um, could you help, maybe see, to be of service but not a servant. Right? Because I think a lot of us, especially when we find that we want to be of service, right and go out there. We contend to let ourselves be taken advantage of but again, become more of a servant than off service. Explain a little bit of that, that difference there. Darren Prince 34:11 I think there's a huge difference when I say you got to become selfish, to be selfless. And the truth is, again, we're all trying to better ourselves. We're trying to feel better about ourselves, not externally, internally. So if you allow yourself to not be of service, but be assertive, and you're still not in a place to live in your higher self, you're you're a yes person and you're being told what to do. You're not living the life that you