Newborn To Teen and Everything Inbetween

Decibelle Creative

Newborn to Teen and Everything Inbetween - it does exactly what it says on the tin! Join childcare experts Becks and Claire for practical advice about how to communicate with children, at all ages. There can be a lot of pressure to 'get it right' when it comes to children, which can be quite daunting! Whether you’re a parent, a teacher, TA or childcare worker, or just looking to gain a better understanding of the world through a child’s eyes, Becks and Claire have 25 years of childcare experience to share with you. Listen for reassurance and support to help you navigate tricky conversations, challenging behaviour, complex emotions, and the general day to day pressures of raising and working with children. This is a judgement-free zone - you won't find a one-size-fits-all rule book here! The perfect parent doesn't exist, but in their family consultancy business Bespoke Family, Becks and Claire believe that a child centred approach which recognises and respects individuality is the best way to enable families to thrive. Join Becks and Claire for accessible, light-hearted and well researched advice and guidance on the various ways we can tackle the ups and downs of life with children (they've got a great sense of humour too, so if you love a laugh you're in great company!) Subscribe to Newborn to Teen and Everything Inbetween - new episodes every fortnight, to help you get the best out of your time with the children in your life. Find Becks and Claire online at: www.bespokefamily.co.uk Instagram: @bespokefamily Search 'Bespoke Family' on Facebook read less
Kids & FamilyKids & Family

Episodes

Being a Surrogate, with Meriel Bernal
May 1 2024
Being a Surrogate, with Meriel Bernal
Please note that Meriel was a surrogate in the US and rules in each country are very different – to find out more about surrogacy rules in the UK you can find them here and more information on surrogacy in the UK here. Meriel is a three times surrogate from the United States. She was blessed to help two families achieve the dream of completing their families through surrogacy. She currently works for an agency as a surrogacy journey coordinator, where she is passionate about helping to create families and supporting other women who wish to embark on the amazing and fulfilling journey of becoming surrogates.  We spoke to Meriel about: What made her decide to become a surrogate and how her family and others reacted (including some funny stories!). What surrogacy is, who might use a surrogate and why that might be. Some terminology and the process for both the family and the surrogate. The contact that the surrogate has with the family throughout the pregnancy and beyond. The labour experience and who shared the labour room with Meriel when she had the babies and how special she tried to make it for everyone involved. What being a surrogate means to Meriel, the joy she took from it and how it has shaped her and her life as it is now as a surrogacy journey coordinator. Some of the rules around surrogacy and being a surrogate as well as the support that there is for surrogates. Keeping in touch with the families after the birth of their baby and whether that happens. Who is on the birth certificate and legalities (spoiler it can be quite complicated – especially in the US!). How research into the best surrogacy path is SO vital! https://www.collectivesurrogacy.com/ - the agency where Meriel works and where you can find her blogs Meriel on LinkedIn Read our blog where we talked to Simon Berney Edwards about his experience of surrogacy here. Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily  For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations    ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’     This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Donor Conception with Becky and Hayley from Paths to Parent Hub
Apr 17 2024
Donor Conception with Becky and Hayley from Paths to Parent Hub
We spoke to Hayley and Becky from Paths to Parent Hub. We first came across Paths to Parent Hub when we listened to their podcast following a recommendation from a friend. We started with Hayley and Becky sharing their own stories with us. Hayley is a donor conceived person herself and is also a parent of twins through sperm donation. Becky was diagnosed with early menopause at 28 – she and her husband did 5 rounds of IVF and then decided to use an egg donor to have her 3 children. Both Hayley and Becky shared their stories on the internet and found each other there. Becky created Paths to Parent Hub (a membership platform) during lockdown to support people in similar situations to themselves and it now has over 1000 members. We also talked about: When and how Hayley found out that she was a donor conceived person and the reasons she talks about her story now. Talking with donor conceived children about how they came to be and dealing with their questions, and those from family and friends. The laws around donor conception and the parallels with adoption.  The experience that Becky had abroad in finding an egg donor and how she feels now about having chosen to have an anonymous donor.  Whether there is a limit on how many families one donor can produce and how this differs around the world. The reasons someone might want / need to use a donor.  Hayley’s experience when finding her parent sperm donor. Terminology around donor conception.  The information you get about a donor when choosing and how the matching works. What Hayley and Becky would say to people considering donor conception. About Paths to Parent Hub and the support, information and connection opportunities. Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily / @pathstoparenthub / @definingmum  @dcp_journey_2_rp Paths to Parent Hub website All things donor conception  - Hayley’s website Paths to Parent Hub podcast For information about a Bespoke Family Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations    ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’     This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Stay at home dad with Lee Lintern
Apr 3 2024
Stay at home dad with Lee Lintern
Lee is Becks’s ‘Boxing trainer’ - (well kind of 😉!) and a personal trainer (to real boxers!). He is also a stay-at-home dad looking after his little girl Beaux which started when she was 3 months old. We talked to Lee about: As a couple how Lee and his wife came to the decision that Lee would be the main carer and how he felt about it. The reaction from friends and family to Lee staying at home with his little one. How he and his wife prepared for parenthood (reading blogs, books, listening to podcasts (ours) and talking to other parents) and how important routine and consistency was for them. The importance of working together as a team, communicating about next steps and what might need to be changed etc. How Lee fills his weeks with Beaux doing groups, dancing, swimming, crafts and play. Fitting in at baby and toddler groups and what it feels like to often be the only dad there.  How Lee feels really lucky to be able to spend this amount of time with his daughter. Being an only child – the worries Lee has about Beaux being one (Claire is one too so no need to worry 😉). Dads and daughters and the wonderful bond they can have! What Lee would say to other stay at home / solo dads. Read our blogs about dads and supporting dads here - https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/gettingtoknowmarkwilliams?rq=dadhttps://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/supportingdads?rq=dad Socials: Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily For information about a Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations    ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’     This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
‘Routines and us’ with Susie Amy
Mar 20 2024
‘Routines and us’ with Susie Amy
You probably already know Susie Amy – perhaps from Footballer’s Wives or maybe from Hollyoaks or as a stage actress (we recently saw her in Fatal Attraction).  We do too, but we are also lucky to know Susie via a mutual friend who gave her a gift of some time with Claire when her first baby was born. Susie didn’t feel for a while that she was ready to use this gift straight away – she felt instead that her baby didn’t like / need sleep and was just a bit different! When Claire spent some time with Susie and her family a routine was introduced and they haven’t looked back! We talked to Susie about: The importance of sleep (and how more sleep means better sleep)! When Claire had worked with her and Raff to introduce a routine - they stuck to it like glue and responded to their baby’s sleep signals, Noa immediately responded! How predictability is important to all of us and how Susie has found the children’s routine helpful for her as well. The responsibility of having a baby feeling huge, but how just a few tweaks and a routine can help so much. Trusting your instincts as a parent. Being nap trapped and how it doesn’t have to be a negative thing! Restorative naps and where these work best. Morning, bedtime and bathtime routines and how important they are from the start. How the best gift for a new parent is support! Instagram - @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily  ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’     For information about a Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations     This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Calling all parents - Have you written a will?
Mar 6 2024
Calling all parents - Have you written a will?
If not, you must listen to this podcast! We spoke to Bik-ki Wong and Helen Thompson who are both partners at Myerson solicitors Bik-ki is responsible for wills, trust and probate and Helen heads up the department that looks after contesting wills. We talked to Bik-ki about: What happens if you don’t write a will? Doesn’t it just go to my husband / wife?  Not necessarily, Bik-ki explained. And what happens if you aren’t married? How many people we know who don’t have a will and don’t want to think about it. The fact that a will doesn’t have to be expensive; you can have a simple one drawn up and there are charities that might write a simple one for you. What happens if you both die and don’t have a will or are a sole / single parent? Appointing a guardian, how you do this and the implications. Some real-life case studies of families who realised they needed to make a will for example because of illness or divorce. How often you should review your will once it has been written. Some of the terminology and responsibilities. The role of an Executor, Trustee, Guardian, how many you should have and things to consider when choosing them. How having family planning meetings around writing wills can be helpful. 3 things that Bik-Ki would say to someone who doesn't have a will. And we talked to Helen about: What happens when... a will is challenged and the associated issues and conflicts. there isn’t a will and the intestacy rules that come in to play where the law decides what happens. for example, a child isn’t provided for in a will because a will hasn’t been updated. Considerations for blended families, step families, solo parents, single parents etc. 3 things to consider when looking at issues with a will. Instagram: @myersonsolicitors @bespokefamily / Facebook - @bespokefamily More information about Myerson can be found here - https://www.myerson.co.uk/ Contact Myerson about making a will hereGovernment information on making a will: https://www.gov.uk/make-will Read our bereavement blogs here including a blog from Bik-Ki about writing a will  ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’     For information about a Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations     This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Katherine Ryan – Potty Training and Parenting!
Feb 20 2024
Katherine Ryan – Potty Training and Parenting!
Violet (Katherine’s eldest daughter) was fully out of nappies by 10 / 11 months, but how did she do it?!  Katherine shares all with us in this funny, insightful and informative episode!  Amongst all the talk of poo and pee, we chatted with Katherine about... The potty training approach Katherine has used –often referred to as elimination communication. She told us how she has used this approach with all of her children by having a consistent routine, watching their faces for signs, offering the potty several times a day and gradually transitioning the children out of nappies. The key she said, is consistency, routine, never to punish and  learn their cues. How Katherine wasn’t sure she would have attempted Potty training twins with this method, but gave us some tips as to how she’d approach it. She felt like waiting to potty train until her children were toddlers would have meant push back to using the potty, but that by using this method it’s all they have ever known! How people reacted to Violet being potty trained so early. Katherine’s approach to parenting being based on instinct, putting herself in her children’s shoes when making decisions on how to care for them. She feels that what is most important is to have a peaceful caregiver and doing things to make this happen with no judgement. Her attitude to social media and how it has affected her parenting (it hasn’t!). How her biggest change in approach since having Violet is considering Bobby as the other parent and convincing him of her wild and wacky parenting ideas (he knows how lucky he is!). Katherine ‘s new TV programme ‘Parental Guidance’ and all the different families she has met through this.   ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including behaviour, toilet training, sleep and more) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’    For information about a Parent Consultation click here: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations     Instagram - @bespokefamily   Facebook - @bespokefamily  This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative
Grandparents and childcare...
Jan 9 2024
Grandparents and childcare...
Managing the dynamic and using grandparents for childcare More and more we are using grandparents to help care for our children, but what do we need to think about? This episode goes into it all, the plusses, the minuses and how to approach it. Some stats – ever wondered how many of us use grandparents for childcare?   Things to think about when asking grandparents if they can help with childcare – how it can really change the dynamic. “Well I raised you OK didn’t I? You’re OK...”. How to get your own parents up to speed (and on board) with the way you want / need things to be done! The relationship we (and children) have with our own parents and had with our grandparents. Having ongoing conversations and communication are important and that family time and childcare time are clearly defined so that it doesn’t impact on your relationship. Making sure the finances and ground rules are all clearly defined. Growing out of going to granny / grandpa’s house. It takes a village! Our Grandparent blogs – https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/blog/category/Grandparents State pension payments - https://www.gov.uk/government/news/looking-after-the-grandchildren-make-sure-it-counts-towards-your-state-pension ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including sleep, welcoming your newborn and caring for your newborn) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’    Instagram - @bespokefamily  Facebook - @bespokefamily    Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations    This podcast is produced by Decibelle Creative / @decibelle_creative
Parenting styles & promoting our children's independence
Oct 10 2023
Parenting styles & promoting our children's independence
How do you deal with it if you have a different parenting style from your partner, parent, friend etc. and how can we make sure that the way we parent is helping to promote our children’s independence?We chatted about: How different parenting approaches can impact on children’s resilience. The fact that we have become very risk averse and have started to always be there (in person or via technology) to make sure our children are OK. How our experiences of being parented can impact our own parenting style.  That our ‘safety mode’ needs to teach our children how to help themselves when we aren’t there. What has changed since we were little without a phone or any tracking apps? Managing risk and trust – children need to feel trusted to try things with our support and suggestions. What happens when we micromanage our children. The importance of talking to partners and other carers about the approach you are taking – it’s a constant review.   Changing your own narrative to take your own feelings out of it and problem solve together with your children. Striking a balance – not being too overprotective but teaching them the life skills to be able to cope. All the animals...! Tiger, Jellyfish, Elephant, Dolphin (lawnmower!) parenting etc.  ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’    Instagram - @bespokefamily  Facebook - @bespokefamily    Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Parenting Mental Health with Suzanne Alderson
Sep 26 2023
Parenting Mental Health with Suzanne Alderson
Suzanne’s own experiences inspired her to set up the Parenting Mental Health charity – in 2015 when Suzanne’s daughter Issy was 14, she was severely bullied at school leading to a sharp decline in her mental health – she was depressed, anxious and suicidal.   We talked through many aspects of this story including:  Issy’s final trigger, her referral and her disclosure to the doctor that she was going to end her life – this was the moment Suzanne shared where the family reached absolute crisis point. Suzanne’s experiences of CAMHS (Children and Adolescent Mental Health Service) and other therapy support. How Suzanne felt she had failed as a parent who just wanted to ‘fix’ what was happening to Issy, as well as the deep shame, trauma and isolation she felt as a parent of a child with a mental health issue. ‘Partnering not parenting’ the programme that Suzanne has written for parents of young people who are experiencing poor mental health. The Facebook group Suzanne set up to support parents in the same critical situation that she experienced and how it grew and grew. How the only control we have over our children’s life is how we behave and how we respond. That love isn’t enough and we need spaces to connect with people who are further along the road with their child’s mental health journey. Suzanne’s 3 things that she feels are most important as a parent - Am I present? Can I be patient? Am I listening? The fact that we don’t have to come to crisis point to change - it starts with today.  That children don’t have to be happy all the time! Suzanne’s advice is to look for presence, not for happiness.   ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including ‘Your Guide to Teens and Tweens’) - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’    Parenting mental health website  Suzanne’s book – Never let go – how to parent your child through mental illness https://www.youtube.com/@parentingmentalhealth Our Tween / Teenage blogs If you have enjoyed this podcast have a look at our other teen episodes. Talking to Teenagers Parenting Teens Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations
Parent Consultations!
Sep 12 2023
Parent Consultations!
A bit of a different episode this week where we introduce you to our parent consultations and give you some information about what they actually involve, including...  How to decide whether a parent consultation is for you. What a parent consultation can help with. The fact that each consultation is tailored to each individual family and their situation.  The overwhelm parents feel with so many different types of information being given to them and the benefit of having someone completely objective look at their situation. The forms and information we need before the call. How important it is that everyone is on board with what the plan is. The packages we offer and how they work. The fact that you might get emotional – but you absolutely won’t be the first one (and you absolutely won’t find judgement on any situation you find yourself in). The importance of consistency to resolve any situation! Coming back to us – we love supporting families on a recurring basis as their children move through the different stages (Newborn to Teen and Everything in Between!). An introduction to our consultants and their backgrounds.   ‘Your Guide to...’ (our downloadable webinars including our ‘guide to sleep’)  - get 25% off any guide with the code ‘PODCAST’    Parent Consultation information  Instagram - @bespokefamily     Facebook - @bespokefamily       Bespoke Family 1:1 Parent Consultations: https://www.bespokefamily.co.uk/parent-consultations